the Aftermath
by ggfan78
Summary: A little idea I decided to play with... 'what if Morgan pulled away from everyone after they all discovered about his childhood and what had happened to him' ... hope you like it. Let me know what you think...
1. Chapter 1

"I don't like digging through his past this way Jayje?"

"I know, but this is to help him Pen,"

"But he'll hate it."

"He will, but he'll have to live with it unless he wants to be thrown into jail for a crime he didn't commit. He'll understand, in time he will Pen."

JJ said trying to soothe her friend who was in obvious conflict of interest. Begrudgingly Penelope sighed and began to search through Morgan's past, his sealed records and other transcripts, feeling the pit of her stomach turning uncontrollably knowing she had overstepped a boundary. Morgan was her friend, and though they were close, there were things that were off limits, and she knew his past was one of them. It never bothered her before, in a lot of ways they were all like that. They trusted each other, but everyone had a skeleton in their closet that they never wanted to release, especially in the presence of those whom you hold such high respect for. After Penelope had uncovered the key that they needed to free Morgan from charges, it wasn't long till the team were headed back. They had all stayed behind to be there for Morgan as they buried the young boy he was accused of killing. She had called him after he was cleared, and he was distant and non committal, unwilling to engage in any form of conversation. Hurt, Penelope hung up the phone and headed home. She considered waiting around for them at the BAU and decided against it. They were all exhausted, and she knew they could all use the time out. Instead Penelope headed to Derek's and cooked him dinner, fed Clooney as she always did when Derek was away.

Derek arrived to find dinner on the table and his dog missing. He knew that Penelope had taken him out for his walk. He inwardly groaned. The last thing he wanted was to see Penelope. Though he understood it was necessary, there were some things he wanted to keep private, and somehow that was gone. He didn't blame her, he was grateful that he was freed from the wrongful allegations, but it made him uncomfortable knowing that they all knew what had happened to him as a young boy. He was embarrassed and somehow he felt violated all over again.

"Oh hey, I didn't realise you'd be back so soon. I just wanted to make sure you had something to eat and when you got in, and take Clooney out for his walk." Penelope said surprised as she walked through the door and found him sitting at the dining table obviously awaiting her return. She walked over to him and gave him a hug. Penelope tried to not feel hurt that he had stiffened at her touch.

"You didn't have to go through all the trouble. Thank you." He replied somewhat robotically. He pretended not to see that his coldness was affecting her.

"No problems. I'll leave you to it. Call if you need anything. Or if you just want to talk. I'm here."

"That won't be necessary. I'm fine." He replied somewhat harshly that she flinched.

"Ugh sure. I'll let myself out."

"Hey hon, you home?" Emily asked as she sank into the chair of her SUV and waited for her Bluetooth to kick in so she could talk to Penelope hands free.

"Almost, I'm about five minutes away. Where are you off to?" Pen asked trying to shake away her feelings from Derek's reception of her.

"Yours if you're up for it. It's been a crap week and I just want to chill, I figured for you too." Emily sensed from the lack of pep in her friend's voice.

"Sounds good, I've got lasagne in the over. I'll see you soon."

"I can't wait. See you soon."

Just as Penelope hung up from Emily, JJ's call came through which peaked her suspicions,

"Are you two tag teaming me?" she asked more touched than annoyed.

"No, we just want to hang out with our friend, is that so hard to believe?" JJ answered with a laugh.

"I'll see you soon Jayje, lasagne is in the oven."

"You're the best!"

"So you keep telling me. Drive safe."

Within twenty minutes they were sitting on Pen's couch side by side, in front of the TV, plate filled with food.

"This is sooo what I needed." Emily sighed in content after taking her first bite.

JJ and Pen exchanged a knowing smile. It had been a hard week for all of them, seeing one of their own in such a position, and having to rifle through his past the way they did to get him absolved all of the charges. Em and JJ knew Pen took it the worst as it put her friendship with Derek in an awkward position. As a team, they were close knit, but there were distinct relationships within the team, in particular Derek and Penelope who were known for their seemingly boundary-less existence. Constantly on the phone to each other, always within physical touching distance, unconditionally there for each other. The three girls were fairly close, and were friends outside the Bureau and more often than not, spent their down time together. Shopping, Movie nights, Pamper days, whatever little time allowed them, they put to good use. Being in the same field of work helped bond them together, at the end of a hard day, they were there for each other.

To say that things were tense when they returned to work was an understatement. Morgan had them all at arms length and though he tried to pass as though things were okay, it clearly wasn't.

"Are we going to address this?" Gideon asked as they watched Morgan from Hotch's office.

"I had hoped by giving him some space and time, he'd snap out of it. What happened all those years ago is in no reflection of who he is today."

"Aaron, as a profiler you know better than that."

"Okay, it does but it doesn't change how we see him."

"No, but it changes how he sees himself. He's denied his childhood for so long that he's forgotten it. He's now not only been forced to deal with it, but the people he works so closely around were the ones who opened the door to Pandora's box."

"What do you think we should do? I don't want to haul him into an office and tell him to see someone. I want him to come to that conclusion himself."

"I guess we wait, in the mean time maybe keep a close eye on the team. This is hard for them too." Aaron looked at Gideon and cracked a small smile,

"You're getting soft Jason."

"Shut up!"

Penelope was running a few scans for JJ who was deciding between two cases and had asked her help for some background on both while she sipped her cup of tea. She watched the monitor, but not really paying much attention, completely lost in her thoughts. A light knock on the door startled her out of her trance,

"Come in," she called out. Jason popped his head in,

"Sir, how can I help you?" she asked in surprise. He certainly was not a frequent visitor of her bunker. Jason on the other hand was just as surprised that there was no quip in her invitation to enter, expecting a, "Enter, the oracle is in" at the very least. He had noticed since their return that she no longer lingered in the bullpen. She was out the door immediately after briefings. Her phone manner had become short, concise and disturbingly professional. He knew that the girls lunched daily if schedules permitted it, and he had seen Reid come down to the bunker to talk to their tech analyst, for reasons other than work related. He had long since observed how intricate her relationship was with each and every person on the team. He knew her value, loyalty and dedication and it bothered him that she was evidently suffering as a result of Morgan's new behaviour.

"I can't work this thing." He said holding up his laptop bringing a smile to Penelope's face, not quite reaching her eyes.

"Hand it over,"

"Ugh Sir, it helps if you turn it on." She said delicately, clearly confused.

"Oh, that explains a lot." He replied sheepishly,

"You didn't really come down here for this did you?" Penelope stated with a raised eyebrow,

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Well thank you. I'm fine." She reassured him,

"We just miss you in the bull pen that's all." He said getting up from where he leaned on her desk and patted her shoulder before exiting with his lap top.

"Thank you." Penelope called out after him as he held his hand up in recognition without turning back. She picked up her mug of tea and resumed her task, the smile remaining on her face.


	2. learning to live without you

_**Hey guys! Thanks so much for your reviews, they certainly motivate me. I have a few avenues in which are swirling around in my head for possibilities of where to take this. There's a hint of Gilmore Girls in this story too. Oh and all characters are not mine =) I hope you enjoy this chapter.**_

"Morgan, we're headed out for drinks. You up for it?" Emily asked as they packed up for the day.

"No thanks, I've already got plans," Which had been his standard response for weeks. Though he had remained focused on the job he had completely distanced himself from them. Each of them felt hurt that he had cut them off completely but there was nothing they could do, as he slammed the door on all of their faces.

"Pen, can I get you another drink?" Reid asked after taking Emily and JJ's orders. Penelope looked up at him distractedly and smiled.

"Yes please, vodka and cranberry." Just as Reid walked away, Morgan walked into the bar, Emily, JJ and Penelope were surprised to see him, but even more surprised to see the young lady who his arms encircled. They watched as she whispered something in his ear that brought a laugh out of him. The man had not so much as cracked a smile in their presence, and here he was laughing with some girl they knew nothing about. Morgan had spotted them upon his entrance but kept his eyes away from their direction. When they had seen Reid at the bar Morgan made a quick introduction,

"Spencer Reid, Taylor Haines my girlfriend. I work with Spencer at the BAU," Spencer politely shook Taylor's hand and failed to hide the hurt from Morgan's disassociation.

"Nice to meet you, have a great evening." Spencer stammered leaving with the four drinks in his hand. Morgan felt what had become a familiar tug at his heart, after weeks of shutting them out, he has had various versions of the same reaction from Reid.

Reid knew that the girls would ask him questions when he reached the table, and prepared himself.

"Girlfriend." He stated as he handed them a drink each. Surprisingly, they merely shrugged their shoulders and moved on to a new topic. The girls had seen the reaction on his face when Morgan introduced him, and they deduced that Morgan had more than likely introduced Reid as some random guy at the office, instead of their partner for so many years. After they finished their drinks they decided to move the party to Emily's apartment. Morgan's obvious disregard for them was starting to gnaw at each of them. From the corner of his eye he watched them leave without a backward glance, and knew he was the reason for their early departure.

"I think it's time for me to go, I have an early start tomorrow." Penelope said as they finished their last hand in cards. It was almost three in the morning.

"You okay to drive home? You're all welcome to stay the night. Pen and Jayje you have stuff here."

"I still need to get my stuff together, thank you though."

"I might stay the night, I doubt I can keep my eyes open long enough to drive." JJ said yawning.

"Can I get a ride Garcia?" Reid asked.

"Of course you can Sweet Cheeks. You ready to go?" Reid nodded getting up. Penelope gave both the girls a hug goodbye.

"Give me a call as soon as you get home okay?" Em said in a non negotiable tone of voice. Penelope rolled her eyes and nodded in compliance.

For a non talker Reid was doing his best work to date on Penelope.

"Reid honey, I'm okay. Really! You guys need to stop worrying about me. I'm not the only one he's hurt. I know he's hurt you too." Reid shrugged.

"I just think if I'm hurt by it, and I'm me. I just hate what it would be like for you." He answered softly. Penelope gave him a small appreciative smile as she placed a hand over his arm.

"Thank you hon. I really appreciate that. Whatever Morgan's issues are right now, he needs to deal with them. Obviously he doesn't want our help but it doesn't mean we stop being his friend. He'll come around Hon, I promise. I'm sorry he's hurt you too." Reid looked at her in amazement, her genuine understanding and her willingness to forgive Morgan was from his point of view, underserved.

"I'll see you tomorrow."

"I keep telling you guys, you don't need to see me off tomorrow, I'll be fine."

"It's what friends do remember?" he teased borrowing one of her many one liners.

"Alright Brat, get out of my car. I will see you in a few hours at my house."

"Thanks Garcia, for everything/"

"Any time my lovely. Any time."

"Hey Hon, I've walked through my front door and have closed it behind me. Home safe."

"Thanks for the play by play." Emily said laughing.

"Well, I didn't want to leave out any details in case I get in trouble."

"Fine, try and get some rest okay, and I will see you in a few hours"

"I will and thank you."

Penelope made sure she had everything she needed and washed out her coffee cup knowing it wouldn't be long till Em, JJ and Reid arrived at her doorstep ready to take her to the airport. Her oldest friend Luke was finally getting married and there was no way she was going to miss it. They had known each other since they were toddlers, their parents were the best of friends, and growing up together they had the luxury of having one another through the toughest of times. Luke was her safe place. With an exception of a childhood photo of a 7 yr old Luke with his arms draped around a 5 yr old Penelope, there were no other trace of him. She kept it that way for a reason, because in their line of work she couldn't take chances. She wanted to keep him safe always, and for her own selfish reasons, she wanted a place to run to where no one could find her.

She had told Hotch that she needed to settle some of her parent's affairs in Hartford, just close enough to Stars Hollow that it wasn't a lie, but far enough to detect connection. She knew that Hotch would interpret her request as time out from Morgan, and at that point she didn't really care. In truth she had a few things she needed to get done without the watchful eyes of her well meaning beloved friends. She had her flight booked and her hotel reservation in Hartford ready. She certainly wasn't staying there, but had made the necessary illegal manouvers to forward all calls to said Hotel to her cell phone to avoid possible missed calls that would lead to one of them flying to Hartford for her.

Penelope was sitting on her door step with her very Penelope pink luggage, with little hand bag designs all over it, when her friends pulled up in Em's SUV. Reid jumped out from the front to help her with bags.

"You are coming back right?" he teased as he took note of the several bags Penelope had lined up.

"You forget my little Genius that I cannot go anywhere without the Laptop or the make up. Both of which have their own bags in which they live in. Then there's the clothes, and the handbag.

"Okay stop! Please." Reid said holding his hands up in surrender, as the three girls laughed at him. The girls had adopted Reid in the last few weeks, when it became apparent Morgan had checked out on him too. Ever since then, he'd become their token fourth.

"Call as soon as you get there."

"I will Em, I promise..." Penelope assured her friend, adding an eye roll as Emily hugged her goodbye.

"See you guys next week."


	3. Being okay with you gone

It was a pretty short flight to Hartford, but it did wonders in Penelope's determination to clear her head of all things Derek Morgan. Though she knew she wasn't particularly successful at convincing her friends that she was okay with the new Morgan that had descended upon them, she still did her outmost to make it seem so, in sheer hope that he would eventually snap out of it, sooner rather than later. As more time passed, the more she had come to believe that the Morgan before them is the Morgan that would stay. The Morgan who couldn't look in her direction, let along in the eye. The Morgan who treated her so coldly that it tore a piece of her each time he did it. She had gotten better as masking how she felt from him, but she knew that their friends who watched closely knew better. Needless to say she was glad to be free of the well meaning eyes that watched over her.

As she emerged from the doors of arrival there he stood, Luke Danes. Her best friend in the whole world, the person who knew her best and the person who had loved her unconditionally from the first moment they met. She grinned dropping her bags to the floor as he enveloped her in a huge brotherly hug. Penelope did not realize how much she needed it till she felt the lump on her throat that she tried to swallow in fear of bursting into tears.

"Hey Bug, it's so good to see you. I've missed you!" he said happily in her ear not letting go of her in his arms. Pen loved that he called her Bug, as he had been doing so since childhood. With the exception of her parents, he had been the only one who called her bug.

"I've missed you too Beanpole!" she replied sincerely holding him tighter than usual. Immediately Luke sensed all was not well. He pulled back to look at her face, and for the first time she felt her walls crumble and the emotions she had pushed back came flooding in and tears began to fill her eyes. Wordlessly Luke pulled her in his arms again and rubbed her back soothingly, allowing her to cry and let it all out. After a few minutes, feeling drained and exhausted the tears stopped.

"God I've missed you." She whispered.

"Back at you Bug. Come on, I know a place that makes your favourite burger. What do you say we head on over there and you can tell me all about it.

"It's the best offer I've had in a very long time Beanpole." Luke grinned swinging her bags on one shoulder and taking her hand in his.

Exhausted from their late night and very early morning, JJ, Emily and Reid walked into the bullpen somewhat in slow motion. They had warned Hotch they may be late because they had insisted upon taking Penelope to the airport and he was more than understanding. Emily and Reid slipped in their chair muttering a polite hello to Morgan, while JJ walked up to her office to get ready for briefing.

"Did she get on the plane okay?" Hotch asked ducking his head into JJ's office as he headed into his. JJ nodded.

"Yeah she did. Just being at the airport you can almost feel the tension depart slowly form her body." Hotch nodded, he hoped that the time away would help Penelope who tried so hard to keep it together.

"Briefing in five minutes? I have the temp Tech Analyst, Kevin Lynch sitting in to get everyone familiarized with him," JJ bit her lower lip nodding,

"It's only for this week Jayje, while Penelope is away. We need a tech analyst, and if everyone gets familiarized with him now it'll make it easier while we're on the field."

"I know Hotch, I do. I'm just not good with change. Regardless if it is only temporary." She replied sheepishly.

"Me too. I'm going to need you to make it okay for the others in there Jayje. Having Kevin sit in, you know how territorial we all get sometimes."

"You got it Boss." JJ assured him with a smile as he smiled back gratefully. JJ was like the little sister he never had and he had great respect for her. She was one of the pillars of the BAU and he knew he would be lost without her. She was a confidant and a friend.

"Everyone meet Kevin Lynch, he's filling in for Pen while she's on leave." JJ introduced as everyone took their seats. Morgan's eyes flinched, though his outward composure remained in tact. He didn't know that she had applied for leave, but then again he had made a point of not knowing anything the last few weeks. He could feel a tinge of resentment that lingered in the room that he knew was directed at him. He had done an extremely good job antagonizing his teammates, his friends. He found himself worrying about Penelope, and hoped that she was okay. Gideon observed Morgan from where he sat. A part of him, a part of all them had hoped Penelope's temporary absence would shake him enough to snap him out of his inward focused existence.

"So up to now, still nothing?" Luke asked as he slid a plate with burger and fries in front of Penelope as they sat alone in his apartment above the diner. Penelope picked up a French fry absently and played with it before putting it into her mouth shrugging.

"Nope, not a word outside work related questions, and even those are far and few between." She spoke to Luke regularly throughout the week. She had a prepaid cell phone that she had for him, that only he, Lorelai and Rory had the number. She had been confiding in him about what was going on and how she was feeling about it all.

"Do any of them know where you are right now?" he asked.

"Nope. They think I am in Hartford taking care of Mom and Dad's affairs."

Gideon and Hotch watched as Reid, Emily and JJ scurried out of the room as soon as briefing had finished without a word. Morgan looked up at is superiors and for a moment it was almost as though he was going to ask about Penelope, but as quickly as it came, it passed. Morgan merely picked up his belongings and walked back to his desk.

"He's making me want to hit him over the head." Gideon admitted. Hotch laughed.

"I think there's a long line, and you're going to have to jump at the end."

"Can I pull seniority?"

"I'm sure if you asked nicely."

"PENELOPE MARGARET GARCIA, as I live and breathe!" Lorelai Gilmore exclaimed as she came through the Diner door, much like a hurricane Penelope observed amusedly.

"Lorelai Victoria Gilmore, almost Danes…lady do you not age at all?" Penelope replied dryly as she got up to give Lorelai a hug hello.

"I am so glad you're here for the wedding."

"I wouldn't miss it for the world. Besides, I promised Luke I would be his best man when I was like 12, so it's not like I could NOT be here for his wedding." Penelope said smiling up at Luke who draped an arm across her shoulder.

"So rehearsal dinner tonight at the Inn? Sookie's really looking forward to seeing you Pen. Rory too, she said to say hello and that she'll see you tonight."

"How is the rugrat?" Pen inquired affectionately after Rory.

"She's well. On her last semester at Yale, and loving it."

"I can't wait to see her. Please say Hi to Sookie for me. I might head on over there early to see her for a bit before dinner."

"She'd love that. I'll see you guys there. I better go. I just wanted to say Hi, and grab a coffee, see my Man of course."

"At least I know where I fall in the line of priorities." Luke muttered. Pen giggled as Lorelai dramatically threw her arms around Luke, smothering him with kisses.

"Goodbye Crazy Lady," he said leading her out the door. Lorelai waved goodbye to Pen and went on back to the Inn.

"It's good to see that some things don't change."

"Yes, she still drives me completely insane."

"And you still love and worship the ground in which she walks. I'm really happy for you Bean."

"Thanks Bug."

"Oh hey, did you get there okay?" Emily asked as she boarded the jet behind the others.

"Yeah I did. Where are you guys off to?" Pen asked as she unpacked. She was staying at Luke's apartment after much protest from Lorelai who was wanting to put her up at the Dragonfly Inn. Penelope insisted that she would be more comfortable at Luke's apartment.

"Baltimore,"

"Let me know how you guys are okay. I may not be there, but same rules apply. At the end of each day I want a roll call." Emily chuckled.

"Back at you. Pen, we're about to take off so I have to go. Jayje and Reid are waving as we speak. We'll call you tonight."

"No problems. Call if you need anything."

"You're on holidays! I will not be calling you for anything work related."

"I might." Hotch piped in.

"You tell him any time."

"I will not. Bye Pen. Take care,"

"You too. Give Jayje and Reid a hug for me. Hotch and Gideon if you're up for it."

"Hmmm, let me think on that. Ugh no!"

Emily made her way to the back of the plane to join Reid and JJ on the two seaters facing each other. She sat next to JJ and took the file from Reid to have a quick read through before they bounced off theories on the plane. Morgan had noticed that Emily, JJ and Reid had finally stopped trying with him. Usually they would attempt conversation, but aside from case related theories they were bouncing off the three of them had remained to themselves. Hotch could see their unit was fracturing at a rapid rate and had already decided to talk to Morgan at the end of the case, as they couldn't continue as they were.

Morgan looked out the window feeling the isolation he had brought upon himself. He was the one who had not only been keeping them at arms length, but purposely short with them, as though he blamed them for what had happened in Chicago. In theory he knew that they only did what they had to, but he still couldn't be at peace with his past, and he wished they didn't know what had happened all those years ago. Though they would never judge him, he judged himself and he was embarrassed. The last person he would ever want to hurt was Penelope and she was the one person he wished didn't know what had happened.

After the rehearsal dinner Penelope and Luke walked back to his apartment, it was the night before the wedding and the last night Luke and Lorelai would spend apart. It meant a lot to Penelope to be sharing the special moments in Luke's life. She was the closest thing to a brother she had, and she loved him completely.

"It's good to see Liz settled, at the same time she's still Lizzie." Penelope said with distinct affection.

"She's happy to see you too. For weeks now it's been Pen this, Pen that."

"What can I say, she'd always worshipped the ground that I walked on."

"That she has. Thanks for everything you did for her and Jess."

"She's family. No thanks necessary. You would have done the same for me."

"I'm sure if you didn't have that crazy job of yours she would have shipped Jess off to you and not to me."

"He was better off here. You're the better role model." She pointed out.

"Well I was the one that was never suspended." He teased. Penelope scoffed and shoved him with her shoulder.

"Low blow Danes."

"You're parents so blew their top at that one."

"Yes, while it was your father that was cacking himself in the corner."

Penelope loved the trip to memory lane. Luke rarely talked about his parents. It was only in Penelope's presence that the memories weren't as painful to recall, perhaps because she understood. They hadn't gone to the same school, but they saw each other almost every day after school. Each memory she had of her childhood was intertwined with him in one way or another. It was Luke and William Danes who had led her back when she lost her way after her parents were killed in a car accident at the age of 18. She had stayed by Luke on William's last days, as Luke held on to his father's hand as he took his last breath, Penelope stood behind him, both hands on his shoulders making her presence known without intrusion. Just as she had when his Mother lost her battle to cancer only a few years prior to her own parent's death. The loss of his mother was the first big loss she had ever experienced, she was a second mother to her. One she loved almost as much as she loved her own.

"Everyone try and get some rest tonight. Tomorrow's a big day." Hotch said as they walked into their hotel floor. The rest of his team nodded, it had been a long and tiring day.

"Night Hotch." Hotch watched as Reid, JJ and Emily walked towards the girls room, knowing that they were probably going to call Penelope together. Reid was sharing a room with Morgan, but there was a chance that he was going to end up bunking in the girls room on their couch. Morgan plucked the last nerve at the club and Reid wasn't in a very forgiving mood, especially with Penelope away.

"Hey Pen, how was your day?" Reid asked,

"It was really good Sweet Cheeks, do I even bother asking you guys how your day went?"

"Probably best not to." JJ called out from beside Reid on the couch.

"Aww honey, that bad huh?"

"You said it." Emily confirmed.

Luke took a shower while Penelope touched base with her friends. From the sounds of it they had another tough case, though Penelope missed her friends, she couldn't say she missed the job. Which made her wonder if it was time to move on. She was never a lifer like Hotch, Gideon, Morgan or even Emily who lived and breathed the BAU. Perhaps it was time to join the civilians again. Luke found her lost in her thoughts when he emerged from the shower.

"Hey everything okay?" he asked worriedly.

"Yeah, I'm okay. Just assessing the meaning of life, contemplating the future of humanity. The usual." She joked smiling.

"Want to run it by me?" he offered.

"Not yet, still processing, but I will once it all makes sense up here." Penelope said pointing to her head.

"You guys mind if I crash on your couch?" Reid asked. Emily and JJ exchanged a look and shook their heads.

"Of course not. I'll grab you a blanket. We're done with the bathroom if you want to go on and get ready for bed?" Reid nodded and grabbed his Pyjamas and toiletries before heading in the bathroom.

"You think that was from last night at the bar?" Emily asked as soon as they heard the shower,

"Maybe, but I think it's more a solidarity you've hurt my friend thing. Reid loves Pen, and if he is hurt by Morgan, I guess he's empathizing that it's a lot more hurtful for Pen."

"Then you add the whole Pen taking time out thing, and Morgan's lack of response."

"Exactly."

"Do you think he's really just switched off those feelings? That he just doesn't care about any of us anymore? I can't believe that."

"I think he cares too much. Which is why he didn't want us to know about his past, and now that we do, he can't handle it."

"But he was a kid, he had no control over what happened."

"It doesn't make it less humiliating."

Morgan lay flat on his back staring up at the ceiling. It was late, and he had guessed that Reid had stayed with the girls. He found his thoughts wandering to Penelope. How he missed her and wished he could talk to her. He wondered where she was and what she was doing. He had blown it and he knew it. He had successfully pushed away the very people he cared so much about. Most of all Penelope. Looking at the clock and picked up his phone.

"Hello," a voice answered muffled, obviously asleep moments before his phone call.

"Hey." Penelope's eyes flew open at the sound of his voice.

"Are you okay?" she asked out of instinct more than anything else.

"I, I can't sleep."

"Don't you have a girlfriend you can call for these things?" she wondered out loud. Derek took a deep breath,

"I'm sorry P. I really am." Penelope remained silent for a moment before she murmured,

"I know. It's okay. Goodnight Derek." Penelope put the phone down before he had a chance to say anything further.

Early the next morning Derek knocked on Hotch's door. Surprised to see him so early Hotch ushered him into his room.

"I need to see someone, to deal with this. I need your help." Morgan said as he paced, his mind running a million miles a minute.

"We'll get you help. Don't worry. We'll get you through this." Hotch assured him placing a hand on his shoulder.


	4. Decisions to make

_**Hey guys, this thing has taken on a life of its own. I was taking it one way and it led here. It's getting more and more complex, which I tried to avoid, but my head has it's own crazy wiring. I hope you're enjoying it so far. Will get to the Pen and Morgan part soon I promise.**_

"My my you are handsome," Penelope complimented as Luke stood before her pointing to what resembled a bow tie. Penelope took the tie in her hands and started working on it silently.

"I'm really glad you're here Bug."

"Wouldn't have missed this for the world. Your parents would be so proud Bean. I know they would have loved to have been here. Mine too."

"Thanks Bug."

The wedding ceremony was beautiful, followed by an equally breathtaking reception. Sookie, Rory and Emily had done an amazing job, and she was happy that Luke was finally settled. It had been a long road for Lorelai and Luke, and they had overcome so much. Penelope had certainly seen it strengthen them.

"Aunt Pen," Jess said as he sat down beside her,

"Hey brat. I liked your last book. "

"Are you responsible for the fact that it was sold out in Washington?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about kid." Penelope replied casually sipping her cup of tea. Pen had kept a closer eye on Liz than she ever would admit to Luke, but suspected he knew. Pen made sure that she saw Jess whenever she was in the area, and growing up he was used to receiving gifts and occasionally talking to her on the phone. With the exception of Luke, Lorelai and Rory, he was the only one who always knew how to reach her. Jess appreciated Pen's presence in his life, and when Liz had shipped him off to Luke he had fought to stay with Pen, who had to explain due to her line of work, couldn't take him in. Mainly because she believed he needed Luke in his life. She would have given up her job if it meant keeping him safe and out of trouble. Being with Luke had done him good. He had grown up a fine young man and she never failed to tell him how proud of him she was.

"You sticking around after the wedding?" he asked.

"Thinking about it, you?"

"Thinking about it, you mind sharing Luke's apartment?"

"Not at all, I've got Luke's room and you can have your old one."

"You mean April's." he corrected.

"April has her own room at their new house. I would say that room upstairs is ready to be reclaimed by its original owner." Jess grinned.

"I guess so."

"So how's Philly?"

After catching up with Penelope, Jess went to find Rory at Pen's coaxing. She was lost in her thoughts when a hand appeared in front of her face. Penelope smiled as she saw look standing before her, asking her to dance. Wordlessly she took it and comfortably fell into his arms. Luke knew that she was miles away,

"Hey, you know just because I'm married, doesn't mean you can't talk to me anymore."

"I'm just thinking."

"Morgan?"

"Yes and No, mostly no. I was just contemplating life outside the FBI and wondered if it's time to pack it in."

"Well, you know I would rest easier if I knew you weren't in constant danger, that you didn't have to see the things that you see that give you nightmares…but would you be happy P? Really? I know how much your job means to you."

"It does, but a part of me feels like I'm drowning at the same time."

"P, you know whatever you decide I'll back. I just don't want you to make a decision because it's uncomfortable for you on a Personal level."

"I know, and I won't. As I said, I'm still working it all in my head."

"So when are you headed home?"

"Few days, I thought about hanging around till you came back from your honeymoon, and I were thinking of bumming out together."

"Running much?"

"Hmm, maybe. I've got a few things I need to do at Hartford too. That was all a lie."

"Like?" he pressed knowing there was something else that Penelope wasn't telling him.

"James Prescott is being arraigned for parole. He requested to see me."

"PENELOPE!" he admonished.

"Luke, I came here for your wedding. I didn't want to tell you."

"You should have. I would have been there."

"I know, but I didn't want to put you through that, I know it's hard for you too."

"P, this guy."

"I know Luke, but a part of me needs to go and see him. It's a closure thing. I can't hate the man for the rest of my life," Penelope said looking away.

"I don't want you to go on your own."

"I'm a big girl Luke. I'll be fine."

"You will call me the moment you're done, you hear me."

"Luke your honeymoon." She protested.

"Do you really want me to challenge me there, you know the moment I tell Lorelai she is going to scold you."

"Fine, I will call." She relented. Luke let the issue drop for the rest of the evening and enjoyed their time together. Luke and Lorelai had a late flight that evening to Hawaii, so Pen said her goodbyes to them unsure if she would be around for their return.

"You'll call."

"I will. I promise. If I'm not here when you guys get back, I will visit in a couple of weeks okay?"

"Don't walk away from something you love because it got too hard P. You'll regret it. Trust me." He whispered in her ear as he hugged her tightly. Pen nodded, knowing he had come so close to losing Lorelai.

"I won't do anything drastic, which is why I'm going to hang here awhile, clear my head, close doors, etc."

"Take it easy ok."

"I will Bean. I promise. You try and have fun."

"I will."

"Hey guys, just checking in to see how your day went. Hope you're all okay. Love you three lots and lots. Talk soon." Emily put her voicemail message on speaker so Reid and JJ could hear her. They had just gotten into the office, their case finally broken. Morgan had walked in mid message and heard her voice, only reiterating how much he missed his friend.

"You guys up for a drink?" Morgan asked trying to ignore the look of surprise and obvious hesitation in their demeanour.

"Sure, just let us give Pen a call back and we can go." Emily answered for all three of them. Morgan nodded.

"Hey Pen, we just got in the office."

"I'm glad you guys are home."

"How are you? We miss you." Reid called out from his chair. Penelope smiled that her absence had evoked such emotion from a usually composed Spencer Reid.

"I'm good thanks Sweet Cheeks. I miss you guys too."

"When are you coming home anyway?" JJ piped in.

"You guys have me on speaker phone in the bullpen. Thanks for the warning." Penelope said with a chuckle,

"What inappropriate thing could you have said that we haven't heard before Garcia?" Aaron threw in.

"Emily Prentiss, you're so going to pay!" Penelope replied sweetly.

"Hey, done with the bathroom." They heard a male voice in the background. Penelope froze and covered the mouthpiece.

"Thanks Kid." Curiosity peaked on the other side by all who stood around in the bullpen. Emily and JJ exchanged an intrigued look. The silence told them that she had covered the phone piece with her hand,

"Glad you guys are home safe. You heading home?" she asked casually as though nothing had happened.

"We're going out for drinks, Morgan's idea." Emily added,

"Well you guys have fun and I will see you soon."

"When are you coming home?" Emily asked again,

"I'm not sure, I have a thing I have to do and I'm hoping that won't take long. I'll call you once I know okay. Have fun tonight, I have to go. Bye everyone!"

JJ and Emily walked to the bar, heads close together talking softly. It didn't take a genius to guess what they were talking about. They were all curious as to who the muffled male voice was in the background. Morgan had bought them the first round of drinks and as they sat around the table, he cleared his throat.

"I just want to say that I know I have been an Ass and I am sorry. I didn't mean to push you guys away, I just wish you didn't have to know. It was just really hard for me to know that you know."

"You know it doesn't change how we feel about you right?" Emily asked.

"In theory, but it was still hard to swallow. I'm really sorry."

"It's okay." Reid answered generously, projecting more Garcia than himself. He knew Penelope would be mad if they didn't allow Morgan to make his amends. Morgan knew by the look of hesitation in Reid's face he had some work cut out for him.

Penelope knew that her friends going out for drinks together would keep Emily and JJ from calling her straight back to interrogate her about the unknown male voice in the background. A legitimate question she was uncertain how to answer. By the time they had finished drinks, it was much too late to call Penelope back.

"Hotch, can we talk?" Emily asked knocking on Hotch's door.

"Come on in Prentiss."

"Ah, this is going to sound a little weird, but how much do you know about Pen? I mean, I know her parent's passed away when she was young, from what I know, she has no siblings, but I'm not really sure. She's quite private about that part of her life, and I guess we all are, but something tells me that Pen is actually away for something in relation to her parents."

"Do you know how they died?"  
"Drunk driver when she was eighteen," Aaron got up from his chair and pulled out Penelope's file and picked up the phone,

"Lynch, run a name for me. James Prescott." Emily watched as a look of worry passed his eyes. Hotch nodded and okay'd throughout the very short conversation,

"Okay, thanks."

"She's in Hartford for the arraignment of the Drunk Driver who killed her parents, he's due for parole." Emily gasped.

"Hotch, can I?" she began but didn't need to finish her sentence.

"Take JJ with you."

"Thanks Hotch."

Emily ducked her head into JJ's office who jumped to her feet before Emily finished her sentence. On their way down, Hotch had emerged from his office.

"Take the jet, it would be quicker than taking a commercial flight."

"Thanks Hotch," Em said meaningfully as she grabbed her go bag. On their way out they ran into Derek.

"Hey guys, where's the fire?"

"No where." Emily answered unable to look at him.

"Penelope, is she alright?" he asked gently grabbing hold of her arm.

"She's okay. We'll call later okay. Don't worry. We'll take good care of her."


	5. Being Honest

_**Sorry for the delay you guys, I've been off sick with a migraine all week. I hope you enjoy this chapter….**_

Penelope was sitting outside the court room in her most sombre of her outfits. She couldn't believe that it had been years since she had sat in the very same court room to watch the man who killed her parents get sentenced. Having gotten caught before and losing his license made it easy for him to get such a harsh sentence, though what punishment could be enough to justify the lost years with her parents. She had a few minutes before it started and just as she stood up psyching herself up, two familiar looking FBI agents flew through the doors. The sight of them brought up the emotions she tried so hard to contain. Without a word they gathered her in an embrace. Penelope felt an overwhelming feeling of grief and gratefulness wash over her.

"Hey Pen, we're here. You're not going through this alone. Let's go in." Em said leading her into the courtroom not letting go of her firm grasp of Penelope's arm. Pen was sandwiched between Emily and JJ, both had an arm looped through hers, shoulders pressing close to her, as though to reassure her that they were there.

Penelope inwardly gasped as James Prescott emerged. It had been so long, yet it felt like it was yesterday that she sat in the very same courtroom, so full of anger for what James Prescott had taken away from her. His eyes fell on Penelope, who stared back at him bravely. Emily read his body language and could see that the man before them was not an intentional murderer, and that guilt and regret was written all over him. She could see the remorse in the way he moved and he knew what he had stolen from her friend. As his case was pled Penelope remained silent. During the deliberation, Penelope met with James Prescott as agreed upon. Sitting there in a room with him, alone while her friends stood in the room next door watching, she waited for him to say what he needed to say.

"I am so sorry for what I took away from you." Penelope watched as his shoulders shook and the tears began to roll down his cheeks.

"I know there is nothing I can do to give back what you've lost, and there are no words to make it better, but if I could take it all back, I would." Penelope remained composed as she heard him out. Nodding to show him that she heard what he was saying, and when he was done, it was her turn to speak.

"I know you're sorry, and I appreciate your wanting to tell me you're sorry, but I don't know what I can give you. If you're asking for absolution, I can't give you that. Only God can. You took away the two people in the world who loved me wholeheartedly, without condition. You robbed me of so many years with them, of what they still had to teach me. Of people who would be there to comfort me when everything seems so dark that I can't find my way out. You forced me to grow up much too quickly. If you want to hear 'I forgive you', they're just words, they won't take away your nightmares, anymore than your 'I'm Sorry' will take mine away. Whatever happens from here on out, I can only say that I know you regret your mistake, and can only hope that your have learned your lesson so that if you are to be released, you will not make the same choice you made that night." Penelope wiped a tear that escaped from her cheek and stood up.

"Good luck," Pen said turning before letting herself out the door. Emily and JJ who had heard each word their friend had said met her with open arms on the other side. Gratefully she fell into their arms wordlessly.

"Let's go. I don't want, or need to know what happens to him from here on out. It's not important."

Emily and JJ nodded and led their friend out of the courthouse. Penelope pulled out her phone and called as promised.

"Bug?" Luke said worriedly

"I'm okay. I wasn't alone. The girls came, and it's all good Bean. I'm okay." JJ and Emily exchanged a look, both wondering if this was the man they heard the night before.

"You sure?"

"Yeah, it's over. Hey Bean, you mind if the girls stay the night at yours with me? The Punk drove the Yale student home and he's apparently going to help her pack up her stuff."

"Of course it's okay. They can stay as long as you want them to. Just throw the punk out." Luke teased. Penelope laughed,

"I will be sure to tell him that."

"You going to be around when I get back?"

"I don't know, I have lots to tell the girls, and it would be great to have you meet them, but it all depends. If I'm not here when you get back, as I said, I will be back in a couple of weeks to check in."

"Good, love you Bug."

"Love you too Bean. Give L a hug for me."

"Will do."

As Penelope hung up she saw the look of curiosity in her friend's faces.

"I'll explain everything on the way. Come with me." She said leading her friends to Luke's truck and helping them throw their ready bags in the back. On the half an hour drive to Stars Hollow, she managed to fill them in on Luke and their history. Pulling into Stars Hollow, they could see why Penelope wanted it to keep it a secret. It was small and quaint, and a perfect place to get lost when their world becomes too much. They understood why she kept Luke a secret and the fear that came with having only a handful of people in your life whom you love dearly, and not wanting them to ever be a target of your career choice.

"Hey Caesar, can I have three burgers and fries? We're just going to head up and get settled in."

"Sure Pen, did you want me to bring them up?"

"No that's okay Caesar, we'll eat down here. Be back soon." Pen said going up the stairs Emily and JJ close behind.

"You guys can take my bed, I've just changed the sheets. I'll take Jess'." She said pointing to the single. It had been established in the car that they were staying as long as it took to take her home. Something they had discussed with Hotch on the plane over to Hartford. They were worried that Penelope was non-committal about returning, and they were afraid that if they didn't take her with them, she may never return.

"So Pen, what else is going through your mind?" Emily asked as they bit into their burger.

"Not much, I just needed to get through this day, everything else was put aside." She replied honestly.

"And now that it has?" JJ pried.

"Admittedly, I wonder if my time at the BAU has drawn to a close. Being here and just makes me realise how uncomplicated it can all be. I love my job, I love you guys, but lately I feel like I'm drowning in the job. I'm tired of the nightmares and constantly being frightened of the things I see on my screen."

"Can you really walk away from the BAU? Just like that?" Emily asked. Penelope saw the hurt in her eyes and placed a hand over hers.

"Walking away from the BAU isn't walking away from you guys. You're my family and regardless what I choose to do, that's what you will remain in my life. You two are the best friends a girl could have, the hardest thing about leaving the BAU, should I choose to, would be not being able to see you girls every day. Reid too. You're what keeps me there every day."

"This has nothing to do with Morgan," she added seeing the wheels turn in their heads.

"I haven't made up my mind, so let's not dwell on this okay. I just want to enjoy a couple of days with my best friends, showing them where I spent most of my childhood. Can we please do that?" Penelope begged. JJ and Emily nodded, knowing there was no other way but to agree.

After lunch they walked around the town. Penelope pointed to specific places and telling them a story and memory for their significance. They learned so much about Penelope in an afternoon that they had in the time they had worked with her. She came alive as she talked about Luke and her memories of Stars Hollow. They couldn't help but get caught up in her excitement. For the first time in weeks, she could see that she was happy.

"Hey Aunt P."

"Hey Kiddo. Did you get Rory all packed up?" Penelope asked as she stirred the sauce on the stove while Emily and JJ set the table for dinner.

"I did. We're going to head out to dinner now and just wanted to let you know I won't be home tonight. I'm going to crash on her couch."

"I figured as much. My friends Emily and JJ came today so I'm going to hijack your bed."

"You're welcome to it. So we still going to hang when I get back?"

"Of course as promised. Call when you're on your way back tomorrow okay. I want you to meet my friends."

"I will do. Night Aunt P."

"Night Kid, give Rory a hug for me." Pen said affectionately putting her phone down.

When Penelope jumped in the shower Emily had called Hotch to give him a quick heads up.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah, it's the happiest we've seen her in months."

"That worries you?" he asked.

"No, I'm glad she's happy. I just wish she could be happy back in Washington." Emily admitted quietly.

"He's getting better."

"I don't think that's a deal breaker anymore Hotch."

"She wants to leave the BAU?"

"It's a consideration." She answered.

By the time Penelope had emerged from the bathroom both JJ and Emily were sitting on the couch with mugs of Hot Chocolate with the TV on. Penelope smiled at them,

"That is the most relaxed I have seen you both." JJ and Emily smiled sheepishly.

"Well, we can certainly see why you love it here."

"I haven't made a decision Em. Don't redecorate my office just yet." Pen teased trying to reassure her friends.

"So what's new?" she asked changing the subject. Before Emily of JJ could answer her phone began to ring a very familiar tone. A tone they all knew to be Morgan's. She considered not answering it, but Emily grabbed the phone and placed it in her hand, as though telling her to answer it.

"Garcia," she answered as she let out a deep breath. Emily went to use the bathroom while JJ took out her own phone to call Reid in the other room. Penelope couldn't help but roll her eyes at her friends as they both departed.

"Hey Baby Girl, how are you?" he asked. Penelope frowned wondering why he was calling,

"I'm fine thank you." Her tone was even and certainly free of the flirting that they were so famous for. As silence filled the air, she knew that he didn't have anything to say to her, and she wasn't about to make it easier for him.

"Was there something you needed?"

"No, I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I didn't know you were leaving, and then you were gone."

"Why would my absence matter to you?"

"It does. You matter to me." He replied,

"Sure could have fooled me." She muttered somewhat angrily.

"I guess I deserve that. I'm so sorry Princess, for everything, for being such a Jack Ass. The last thing I wanted to ever do was hurt you."

"Funny, because it seemed like that was a personal goal for you these last two months."

"I know, and I just…"

"Look, it's fine. We're just two people who work together right. I've learned to live with that."

"No Baby Girl, you've always been more than that." He said pleading.

"Excuse me if I have a problem with believing that right now. I know you're sorry Derek, and I even understand why you wanted to push us away. I even forgive it, but you can't take it back and just pretend it never happened, because it hurt, and though I may forgive you. I no longer trust you. Our friendship meant everything to me, and the last two months showed me how little it meant to you." Derek felt that knife twist in his gut, knowing how much he had hurt all of them, Penelope the most. She was his best friend, and he walked away from her.


	6. It's too hard to stay mad at you

_**Hiya, hope you guys likes this chapter. It's a few bits and pieces of setting up for what's coming up…. Not that I've decided as yet to what that is =)**_

After they hung up JJ and Emily emerged from their corners. Penelope stared at the phone in her hand, she couldn't believe she had said all that to him, but she was being honest. He had hurt her immensely, and she wasn't going to let him swoop on in because he was ready to make it all better. He crossed the line, and a part of her didn't want to go down that road again with him. It had hurt far too much.

"I don't want to talk about it. At least not yet." Penelope said looking up at her two friends, who nodded in understanding.

JJ and Emily took the day to explore Stars Hollow when Jess arrived, knowing that Pen and Jess needed some time together. Their couple of days in Stars Hollow flew on by, and they enjoyed every minute of it. By Wednesday they were on their way back to Washington. Jess had driven them to the airport.

"It was good to see you Kid. You should really visit me more often."

"Really?" he asked knowing that Penelope always tried to keep work life and private life separate.

"You're old enough and ugly enough I guess." She teased hugging him close.

"I'm really proud of you." She whispered in his ear,

"I know Aunt P. That means a lot." Jess replied meaningfully. Penelope tousled his hair affectionately as they headed towards the gate waving at him.

JJ and Emily knew where Penelope drew her strength from, and that was her family. Luke, Jess, and the people of Stars Hollow were her family. People who have known her since she was young, they saw how by being there she was able to recharge. Laugh, and just be herself which in the last months, she had been unable to do. As much as they knew the BAU was a family in it's own right, her bond with Luke was different. It was literally from cradle to grave, completely unconditional.

Reid left the BAU early, excited to have the girls coming home, in their absence Morgan had done his best to re-establish their camaraderie, and little by little Reid was letting him in. He could only hope that Penelope would give him the same chance. He had not called back since their last conversation, but he sent her a text message every day asking her how she was, never failing to tell her that he was sticking around for as long as it took for her to forgive him. A part of him wanted to go with Reid to the airport, but he didn't want to overwhelm her and he respected her space, for now. As the girls came out of the arrivals they found Reid beaming and waving, obviously happy to have them home. After much hugging and excited chattering, they were finally driving out of the airport. The four of them picked up Chinese on the way home and hung out at Garcia's for a couple of hours before Reid took Em and JJ home.

Just before she got ready for bed, Penelope received a message from Derek.

"Hey Princess, I trust that Reid got you home safely. See you tomorrow. Sleep well." Penelope sighed and climbed into bed without replying. The next day will in no doubt be an interesting day.

Penelope rose early the next day in hope that she will be able to slip into her bunker without being noticed. She knew that she couldn't hide forever but she sure was going to give it a shot. Hotch, who is always first in the office saw Penelope walk briskly to her office, obviously trying to avoid detection. Hotch waited a few minutes before making his way down to her bunker and could hear the muttering under her breath. Hotch smiled as Penelope berated Kevin Lynch who obviously wasn't there for messing up her office. He could hear her throw things in the bin as she continued to mutter. Knocking on her door he heard her stop, panic filled her not wanting for the person on the other side of the door to be Derek,

"Come in," she managed to squeak and Hotch saw the relief that passed through her eyes as she saw that it was he that stood before her,

"Hey Hotch, what brings you by?"

"Making sure that our favourite Tech Analyst was settled into her lair. I trust that Kevin Lynch hasn't left any permanent damage to your domain as there is no Wanted poster scattered as yet."

"I haven't had a chance, and besides you know I would just hire a hit for him. No need for posters." She joked as she threw the last empty coffee cup in the bin.

"Sir, you may need to hold me down should our paths cross. No one treats my babies this way and gets away with it."

"I will do my outmost. It's great to have you back Garcia. It just isn't the same without you here."

"Why thank you Sir. I appreciate the sentiment."

"Did you have a good few days off? Everything get squared away?" He asked careful not to pry.

"I did have a good time. Thank you for letting JJ and Em come down for the arraignment. I really appreciated it."

"Nothing to it. You could have told me why you were going Garcia. We could have been there for you."

"I know, you were and that means more to me than I could possibly say. I just don't like bringing up the past. It still haunts me. I guess most of us are haunted by our past." She said quietly. Hotch nodded knowing exactly what she was relating to.

"You know if you need anything, all you have to do is come and talk to me."

"I do. I will." Just as he was about to leave her office, he stopped at the door.

"He's asked to see someone to help him get through this. He asked for help." Penelope looked up to meet his eye,

"I'm glad Hotch. He'll get through this. I know he will." She said it with such certainty that if Hotch had any doubts they would have disappeared. She believed in him, and their current predicament doesn't change that faith she had in him.

"It's great to have you back Penelope."

"It's good to be back Sir."

Hotch had called them all in for the briefing, and as Penelope walked into the briefing room Morgan lifted his gaze to meet hers.

"Welcome Back Penelope. It's good to have you back." Gideon greeted.

"Thank you Sir. It's nice to be back." she replied with a smile. JJ briefed them on their next case which had all of them, including Penelope on the jet in half an hour. It was rare for her to ever be required to be with the team, but seeing as their serial killer was posting his murders online, they needed for her to be on hand.

The case was a vicious one, and Penelope had to watch each murder as they were posted online. Analysing each frame in hope to find some clue to the whereabouts. It was taking a toll on all of them especially Garcia. After they had watched the last video, Penelope had discreetly excused herself to get some fresh air. She had done all she could for now, and all she wanted was some air. She was leaning against the balcony rail trying to clear her head of the visions that filled her screen only moments before. She closed her eyes, and they flew open, as all she could see was the last victim. She wondered if she wanted to do the job anymore. Derek watched her from the doorway her defences were down as she thought no one was watching. It broke his heart to see the walls rise when she realised that she wasn't alone, that it was he that stood there watching her, waiting to comfort and console her. They had not spoken since that night, whatever verbal exchange was had was case related.

"I just wanted to check on you. Make sure you're okay."

"Yeah, I'm okay. Trying to erase the images in my head, but it's hard. Sometimes I marvel at humanity and how cruel it can be."

"It's hard to fathom what some people can do, but it gives me comfort that we can sometimes do something about it. When we save a life, when we catch the bad guy. It counts for something. What we do, what you do, it counts for something." Penelope merely sighed,

"I miss my friend." She said in a whisper that he almost missed it. Without waiting for a response Penelope walked back into the hotel room to resume her searches.

"He misses you, and he's right here." He whispered back.

After a few days the case broke and they were on their way home. As they got off the jet Penelope's second phone began to ring.

"Oh hey, I am so sorry. I was on a case and been away. I haven't had a chance to drop you a line."

"It's okay. I just hadn't heard from you since you said you got home safe and wanted to make sure all was okay."

"Yep, just getting off the plane now, can I give you a call when I get home?"

"Sure Bug!" Penelope put away her pink phone and proceeded to pick up conversation where it left off ignoring the curious glances. JJ and Emily knew that it was Luke, in their time with her they were privy to Luke and Penelope exchanges.

"I'm going straight home. Spence you need a ride?" she asked knowing his car was still at the dealer.

"No thanks Pen, Jayje said she'll run me home."

"Great, I'm going to go. See you guys later." She said with a wave heading to her car.

"So how's co-existing?" Luke asked as he took the phone out of the bedroom careful not wake his sleeping wife.

"Interesting, that's for sure. He's trying, and I appreciate that. I'm just letting the hurt subside a little."

"Only fair. You given any more thought about what we talked about?"

"After this case, I couldn't help but think about it. I still haven't reached a decision, but it's there."

"Are you free to come down this weekend. Stars Hollow Firelight Festival is this weekend, and I know how much you love that."

"Aww, I do. I saw all the preparation for it while I was there. I might. As long as we don't get a case I can come down for a couple of days, if anything I can at least stay one night."

"That would be great. Rory is coming home for the festival, so is Jess and April."

"Jess Mariano, agreeing to participate in a town events. Second to the McScrooge ala Danes."

"Well I did throw in there that you might come home for it too." Penelope laughed,

"Ha! I certainly am flattered. Count me in, hang on for me one sec, someone's at my door." Penelope looked through her peephole and there he stood, one Derek Morgan.

"Hey Bean, I gotta go. Call you tomorrow?"

"Is he at your doorstep?"

"Yup,"

"Cool, talk tomorrow. Or if you need to talk later, you can call then too."

"Thanks, I may need to take you up on that. Goodnight. Love you."

"Love you too Bug." Penelope sighed as she unlocked her deadbolt and unchained her door.

"Hey," she greeted standing there in her cupcake pyjamas, pink hoodie, hair in a loose ponytail.

"Hey Babygirl, can we talk?" Penelope knew that there was no avoiding him any longer, how she had managed to do so to date is in itself a surprise.

"Sure Morgan, come on in. Can I get you a drink, water, beer, coffee, tea?"

"Whatever you're having." Penelope grabbed another mug from her cupboard and poured him tea from the pot.

"Thanks," he said as she handed him the mug. Penelope sat on the couch beside him waiting for him to begin.

"You mean a lot to me Pen. You're my best friend. You're the one person who whether it be the middle or the end of a really bad case I know I can look to, who'll make me smile and make it okay. With the exception of my sisters and my mother, there is no one else I am closest to, which is why it was really hard for me to know that you found out all about what happened when I was young. I've tried so hard to forget it that I almost did. Then this whole thing happened and you guys had to find out. Though I know it doesn't change how you see me, it changed the dynamics for me. I didn't want you guys to imagine the worst moments of my life, I didn't want you guys to see me as the victim. Least of all you, I was ashamed, and I am ashamed. I'm sorry I treated you so horribly, I just didn't know how to look at you after that. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt you and I just didn't know how to take it all back. It seemed easier to avoid you all together, and then you left, and it made me realise how much not having you in my life wasn't something I wanted. I need you in my life Pen," Penelope placed a hand over Derek's and gave it a brief squeeze.

"Being mad at you takes way too much energy, and I don't want to come to work having to avoid you and act less than what we are. I can't guarantee that it's not going to be hard, but I promise to try harder than what I have been."

"Really?"

"Yeah," she replied with a smile.

Honouring her promise to him, Penelope made a conscious decision to let go and just let their friendship run its course. The difference was felt and appreciated by all. On Friday as Penelope met the girls at the bullpen ready for their girly road trip and weekend away. Penelope was taking them to Stars Hollow for the festival and to meet Luke.

"Where are you girls off to?" Hotch asked as they chatted excitedly,

"Road trip Hotch!" Pen answered not giving anything away.

"We'll check in when we reach destination," Emily promised giving Aaron's arm and reassuring squeeze. After giving Reid a quick hug and a promise to take him next time, the girls were off.

"This is fun!" Emily said as she rode shotgun. Penelope kept the top Esther's top off and they enjoyed the drive to Stars Hollow. Finishing early, right after lunch due to good behaviour meant that they could take their time driving to Stars Hollow and making a couple of pit stops. Instead of staying at Luke's, Lorelai had organised three adjoining rooms at the Dragonfly for them. When they reached the Dragonfly Lorelai flew out of the doors to greet them.

"Penelope Garcia, you're spoiling us with your regular visits, you're going to make me nag you to do it more often." Lorelai declared hugging Penelope.

"Luke has been beaming for days."

"It's nice to be home." Penelope replied.

"What happened to my phone call?" Luke chastised walking up the driveway and pulling her into a hug.

"Who needs a phone call when I know you would be looking out for Esther as we drive down the town square? Guys, I want you to meet my friends, Emily Prentiss and Jennifer Jereau, who goes by JJ. This is Luke and Lorelai. Star Hollow's very own Romeo and Juliet without the tragic ending." Lorelai laughed as Luke chuckled.

The girls loved their rooms, and kept the doors open so that they could walk in and out of each other's rooms.

"Who's calling Hotch?" Emily asked out loud as they unpacked.

"Is that a rhetorical question?" Penelope called out from her room, as JJ laughed.

"Very funny. I don't know what you're laughing about there Miss Jereau, have you called Reid yet?" Though each of them were in separate rooms, without a doubt they knew that JJ had blushed at Emily's teasing, and her silence confirmed it. As though on cue Penelope's phone began to ring a familiar tune,

"Hey handsome, your timing is impeccable as always." Penelope answered amused,

"Hey Baby girl, just checking in to make sure you girls made it to your destination safely."

"You lost the toss didn't you?"

"Sorry Baby, I tried really hard not to lose, but Hotch pulled rank and Reid is too good at numbers."

"Tell the rest of the boys that we're fine. I'm sure Em and JJ will still check in with Hotch and Reid a little later." JJ and Em poked their head into her room and gave her a sheepish smile.

"Leave them alone for a weekend and they get all out of sorts."

Arm in arm the three girls wandered through town to Luke's for dinner with Lorelai, Rory, April, Luke and Jess. Sookie and Jackson we're going to meet them after to head to the festival together.

"It's great to finally meet you girls. P talks about you guys a lot, and it makes me feel a whole lot better knowing that you guys are looking out for her." Luke said to JJ and Emiy as they ate dinner.

"Aww Beanpole, you're such a softie."

"We're happy to have met you too," Em replied sincerely taking an immediate liking to the Luke, Lorelai and the rest of their family.

As JJ and Emily excitedly went through the festival stalls with Rory, Lorelai and April, Luke and Pen staggered behind them talking.

"So you've talked."

"Yeah, as I said to you on the phone, it was one of those, it's too tiring to be mad at you thing, and he's been trying and I've been trying, and with time, who knows."


	7. Things you need to know

Months passed, and slowly things between Derek and Penelope had returned to their almost norm. There were moments of hesitation from time to time, and as more time passed, they came few and far between. With the addition of Taylor in his life made it easier to not fall back on habits. Penelope was well aware of how much she relied on Derek, and how they had both taken it for granted that they were each other's first point of call. How in a lot of the most important ways, they were that support for each other that was usually saved for someone's significant other. Derek had recognised the difference in their relationship, and though he knew that Penelope had long since forgiven him, their friendship wasn't the same. Sure the flirting had returned, but it was guarded and their seemingly boundary-less friendship, all of a sudden had boundaries.

"Hey Princess, what you up to tonight?" Derek asked popping his head into her office. Penelope turned to face him and flashed him a smile.

"Dinner with a friend and his wife. They're in town for their three month wedding anniversary." Penelope couldn't believe that Luke and Lorelai had been married for three months, how so much had changed in that span of time.

"We're meeting up with JJ and Emily after dinner for drinks. I think they'll bring their token boys, if you're up for it you and Taylor are welcome to join us." She added generously.

"Taylor's out of town, but I'm in."

"Great, I'd love for you to meet Luke," in mid sentence her direct line began to buzz

"Garcia, sure. Thanks Lexy. I'll be right down." She said jumping to her feet in obvious excitement.

"Speaking of which, they're here. Would you like to come and meet them?" she asked,

"Sure," he replied with a smile as he followed her to reception.

Penelope's grin widened at the sight of Luke and Lorelai. Without reservation, Penelope ran over and threw her arms around them both.

"You're here! Could it be that I miss you guys?" Luke laughed as he gave her an extra long hug lifting her off the ground.

"It's good to see you too Bug. It's been over a month since your last visit."

"I keep telling you if you're going to spoil us with your constant presence, you better be ready to stick to frequency." Lorelai teased and Penelope pulled her into another hug.

"I know, I'm sorry. It's been crazy busy here. Guys, I have a friend of mine I'd like you to meet. Derek Morgan, this is Luke and Lorelai Danes." Derek stepped forward and held his hand out to Luke, who was seemingly checking him out. Derek could see how comfortable Penelope was with the man that stood before him. A man he knew nothing about. Penelope could see the wheels turning in Derek's head, but before she could explain the dynamics Em and JJ emerged from BAU doors.

"We thought you may have been the reason as to why there was a blur of Pen that passed us a few minutes ago." Emily observed teasingly.

"Hey Girls!" Lorelai and Luke greeted both with a hug.

"Emily, Sookie made you girls a mountain load of rocky road cookies." Lorelai said with a smile.

"I love Sookie!"

"What's a Sookie?" Derek asked, feeling a little left out.

"Sorry Morgan. Sookie is Lorelai's best friend, who's an amazing chef. Lorelai here is Luke's wife, which duh you figure, and Luke, well the best way to describe him would be, brother by heart, old family friend, best friend since birth, my hero." Pen explained in pure adoration.

"Aww Bug, you make me blush."

"You're the kid in the picture Pen has in her office?"

"Seriously, you promised to replace that."

"Sorry Beanpole. I love that picture."

Derek watched their exchange and admittedly jealous that his baby girl had such rapport with anyone else but him. It also didn't go unnoticed that the girls had already met such an important person in her life, while he had not, nor had he known about him. Penelope gave his arm a reassuring squeeze, accompanied with a smile. She knew he was overwhelmed.

"Are you ladies sure you don't want to join us? We have the whole day with P tomorrow, so if you're worried about that, don't be." Luke assured them,

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, it'd be great to catch up with you guys properly and finally meet the boys." Lorelai said excitedly.

"Derek, please join us for dinner." Luke looked at Derek and extended the invite, to which he nodded.

"Why don't you guys come on in and meet the rest of the team." Penelope led them to the bull pen and introduced them to each member of the team, and extended the invitation to dinner to all of them. Derek observed the interaction between Penelope and Luke, the unspoken communication between them, and how regardless on how he doted on his wife, he was still able to discern and cater for Penelope's every need before she could even vocalise them. There was a pure sense of adoration radiating from Penelope as she looked at Luke and explained their dynamics to the team, their history and background. They all understood how Penelope would want to keep Luke a private matter, they knew that he was the last person tied to her childhood and she was scared that what she did would ultimately put him in danger. At the same time she wanted her BAU family to meet her family. She and Luke had talked about it somewhat extensively.

Dinner with all the people she loved meant the world to Penelope, and when the cake came out for her birthday she gave Luke a look that meant he was in trouble. In all her years at the BAU she had managed to remove her birthday from logs, and when asked, avoided the question at all cost. Even Derek and the girls had no idea, which is just the way she liked it, and more often than not she was not in Washington for her birthday because she always made sure she was in Stars Hollow for the occasion. Several faces turned to her in disbelief,

"PENELOPE MARGARET GARCIA, how have you gotten away with not telling us your birthday?" Emily asked a little mad.

"I change the subject really well." She replied sheepishly whacking Luke on the arm for what he did.

"Hey, you should know better than to not come home for your birthday." He said grinning.

"Everyone sends their love, and Sookie baked you the cake." Lorelai slipped in.

After singing her Happy Birthday the waiter had taken it away to cut. Many expectant and somewhat dumbfounded faces looked at her as she raised her gaze,

"If it's at all any consolation, today isn't my real birthday. It's just tonight was the night Luke and Lorelai were coming in on their way to New York to celebrate their anniversary." She explained shyly.

"We just wanted to kill two birds with one stone. P mentioned she couldn't come to Stars Hollow this year for her birthday because she was going away with the girls," Emily and JJ turned to Penelope,

"So that's why?" JJ asked, as she shrugged in response,

"I figured it was time for new traditions, and couldn't think of a better way to celebrate my birthday than hang with you two lunatics."

"So when's your real birthday?" Reid asked.

"In a few days, hang on, is that why you guys are celebrating your anniversary here so you can see me for my birthday?" Pen asked as it finally fell into place. Luke shrugged,

"After 30 odd years, of being a part of your birthday, it seemed wrong not to see you at least around your birthday. It just so happened that our wedding anniversary fell around the same time,"

"Thanks Bean." Pen said appreciatively leaning into him as she gave her shoulder a brief squeeze.

"Thanks Lore. I'm glad you guys are here, and have met the rest of the family." Hotch and Gideon beamed with pride. The bond between their team was rare and they never took it for granted. They were indeed a family.

"Don't think for one second you're going to get away with not telling us your birthday Penlope." Hotch said as they were all saying their goodbyes.

"Well, I think there's a line Hotch." She said pointing to Emily who was shuffling into her coat. Hotch smiled,

"True. You have a great birthday weekend. We will see you at work on Monday."

"Thanks Boss."

Lorelai and Luke were staying with her that night, and spending the whole day with her the following day before heading to New York and she and the girls are jumping in her car for their spa weekend. After Lorelai had gone to bed, and Luke came in search for water in the kitchen, he found Penelope in the living room, lap top on hand.

"Hey, what are you up to?"

"Visiting memory lane." She said turning her lap top around so he could see the photos of her parents."

"They'd be real proud of you Bug."

"I know, I miss them more on days like today. I'm really glad you got to meet everyone. It means a lot to me." Luke dropped a kiss on her head before sitting beside her to look through the photos.

After an extremely fun day with the Danes, Penelope went to the BAU to pick up the girls as planned. She was sitting on Emily's desk waiting for her to get out of the bathroom talking animatedly to Reid when Morgan emerged from Hotch's office, surprised to see her.

"Hey Baby Girl. Thought you guys were going to you 'Girls gone Wild' weekend?" he teased dropping a kiss on her head as he passed her.

"On our way Mon Cherie, just waiting for the girls to stop primping and we can get out of here."

"Hey, you've had the whole day to look seamless while we worked." JJ said defensively as she and Emily came in.

"Okay okay." Penelope said bringing her hands up in surrender flashing Reid a wink.

The girls had an awesome time away, and vowed to do it more often. They had stayed at a resort with a Day Spa, which meant they were pampered most of the weekend with massages, facials, manicures and pedicures. In the evenings they treated themselves to fine dining restaurants and enjoyed the night life that the city offered. On their last night, they had come home at 3 in the morning from dancing, and were tired but wide awake. The three of them were sprawled on the couch, legs tangled on one another, with mugs of hot chocolate courtesy of room service.

"This is so the life." Penelope said with a deep sigh of contentment.

"It sure is, hey Pen. When is your actual birthday?" JJ asked,

"Tomorrow, well actually today." Penelope answered with a yawn, her two friends who sat at either side of her grinned and both leaned forward to drop a kiss on her cheek.

"Happy birthday Pen. We're glad we got to share this day with you."

"Thanks you guys, me too."

Emily was scheduled to be dropped off first, Sunday evening, and she insisted on having the girls come down for coffee.

"Hey Em, why is your place so dark?" Penelope asked, but before Emily could reply, all the lights in her apartment turned on, accompanied with a loud

"SURPRISE!!!" Penelope watched as every member of their team jumped out of their hiding places,

"Oh my gosh!" She squealed in surprise as her eyes fell on both Danes', Jess, Rory, Sookie, Jackson and April. Rory and Jess flew into her outstretched arms,

"Thanks you guys, how did you pull this off?" She asked looking at her friends, who had obviously been busy for days now.

"We have our ways," Gideon replied dropping kiss on her temple.

"Thank you so much. Has everyone met everyone? Well, minus Jayje and Em who were obviously with me," she asked. Everyone else had nodded, the boys had gotten to know Luke, Lorelai, Rory, Jess, Sookie, Jackson and April as they arrived earlier that evening. The stories they heard about Penelope made them realise they only knew a piece of what a wonderful person that she was.

"Pen used design these awesome Halloween costumes for me when I was younger, Mom and I used to still live in the Garden Shed at the Independence, and she knew that Mom was working all hours to make ends meet, and she used to start the costumes, and Mom used to finish them,"

"She taught me how to sew." Lorelai said proudly.

"Aunt P, has always just been there. I mean, Luke was too, in the tough love kind of way, but Aunt P never gave up on me, even though I gave her every chance to." Jess said clearing his throat,

"I told you kid, I never will." She said ruffling his hard with her hand.

"I guess it's my turn," April said rather awkwardly,

"I don't have the memories that Jess or even Rory have of Aunt Pen, I sure wish I did, but if there is one thing I know about Aunt Pen is that she loves me, that she loved me from the first moment she knew who I was. She has been a part of my every day life since, with emails, text messages, phone calls, etc. Though I came in so late in the picture, I have never felt as though she loved me any less than Jess or Rory, and I really appreciate that."

"Aww cupcake come give Aunt Pen a hug," April obliged walking into her arms.

"Love you Kid." They heard her murmur in the young girl's ear.

After the speeches and many tears, Penelope blew out another cake for her birthday, but she found that her one wish had already been filled. She was celebrating her day with the people she loved most in the world, and there was nothing else in the world that she could want more than that.

"Hey Princess, happy birthday." She heard him whisper from behind.

"Hey Handsome, thanks for being here."

"And miss your birthday, not on your life."

"That's good to hear." She admitted,

"You doubted it?" he asked as she merely shrugged,

"A lot has changed between us. Whatever we had seems to have been lost." Her lips confessed what her heart had so long grieved for. Derek tucked a strand of loose hair behind her ear and caressed her cheek with his hand,

"As hard as we try, it's as though we can never get that back." Derek leaned forward and placed his lips on her forehead,

"I'm still here." He promised wrapping his arms around her and drawing her close to him.

"You're my best friend Pen, that will never change."

"Then why does it feel as though it already has. You're not there anymore Derek. You haven't been in a really long time despite how hard you've been trying. I hate that you're trying so hard to get back to where we once were. Something that was so effortless has become such a task, and I hate that. I know nothing about your life these days, and though you make a point of being around, you're not really which makes it harder to have you around. I know everything changed after Chicago, and I understand that, but I felt like I lost you, and every day that we continue in this co-existence, it feels like I lose you again and again." Through her eyes he could see the hurt and torture she felt, and his heart broke. He took her hand, and led her out to Emily's balcony and closed the door behind them.

"I don't know where to start Pen…all I know is that Chicago did change everything. I knew I didn't want you to know of my past, and when you did, it shifted everything, and it has only been the last couple of days that I realised why it has been so hard to relate to you after everything. I love you Pen…. I'm in love with you."

_**Sorry to cut it off there you guys, but I'm off to work. I will work on it once I get there though so don't panic. Hope you like it. **_


	8. You're what?

_**Savin' Grace, just for you! Enjoy! =)**_

"You're what?" she exclaimed dumbfounded.

"I'm undoubtedly, inexplicably in love wit you Penelope Margaret Garcia."

"What about Taylor?"

"We broke up months ago. She realised my heart wasn't in it so we decided to just remain friends." Penelope blinked unable to utter a word.

"I know this is a huge shock, and I am sorry to just throw it out there, but you asked." He said sheepishly, somewhat frightened of her reaction.

"Are you sure?" she asked quietly, trying to process it all in her head. She had dreamt of such a moment, but she'd never entertained it far enough to rehearse a response from herself. Derek lifted her chin with his finger and leaned in to place his lips against hers. As her heart fluttered she found herself responding to his kiss.

"Guys, cake's ready." Emily said bursting out the doors not realising what she had walked into.

"Uh sure. We'll be right there." Penelope answered quickly jumping back from Morgan.

"Sorry guys, take your time." Emily stammered finally realising what she had interrupted. Penelope looked at Morgan,

"Can we talk about this later?" she asked giving his hand a quick squeeze.

"Of course Baby Girl." He replied dropping his lips to her head as he ushered her into Emily's living room, where everyone with the exception of Emily were none the wiser.

"Aunt P, can we stay at yours tonight? We're not really wanting to bunk with Uncle Luke and Aunty Lorelai?" Jess asked speaking for Rory, himself and April.

"Of course you can. If I can swing it with my boss, what do you guys say we hang the whole day, and leave your parentals to do their own thing?" Hotch merely smiled and nodded his consent.

"Awesome, can we go to that gallery again Aunt P?" April asked excitedly.

"Honey, we can do whatever you guys want." Penelope said draping an arm around April's shoulder as she threw Derek an apologetic smile. Whatever chances they had of finishing their conversation that evening had dissolved. Derek merely smiled at her in understanding.

When she saw Derek slip into the kitchen, Penelope discreetly followed him and found him staring out the window. Letting out a deep sigh she placed a hand on his shoulder. Derek turned to face her and smiled.

"Hey Baby Girl, you having a good time?" he inquired.

"Yeah I am, I love having all the people I adore under the one roof. I feel incredibly blessed and spoiled. Listen, I'm sorry our conversation got hijacked."

"I know, it's okay. We will talk. Just promise me that you're not going to spend the time from here to then talking yourself out of the possibility." Though he was smiling, she could see that he was serious.

"I will do my outmost. Just give me time to let it sink in okay. I'm not running, well I am making the conscious effort not to run. I've been in love with you for so long that it's second nature. Never once did I ever entertain the idea that you could ever feel the same way." Penelope admitted unable to meet his gaze,

"You're crazy! I suspect I've been in love with you from the first moment we met."

"You're sweet. Now I better get back there before Emily comes flying into the kitchen looking for me. We'll talk handsome. I promise." Penelope watched as he nodded and turned back to face the window. She walked up to him and kissed shoulder before leaving him with his thoughts. As she emerged from the kitchen Emily raised an eyebrow noticing the Derek was not in sight. Penelope crossed, and then rolled her eyes making a mental note not to be cornered by Emily for the remainder of the night.

Luke draped an arm around Pen's shoulders as she sat beside him on the couch.

"You having a good time Bug?"

"I am. It's been a very interesting evening. One that I cannot really get into right now, but will definitely offload in a couple of days upon your return to the Hollow,"

"Sounds rather ominous,"

"It is and it isn't. Thanks so much for coming down for my birthday and letting these guys horn in on your Anniversary plans."

"Happy to have it interrupted. It's about time your worlds crossed path Bug. You can't protect us at the expense of yourself. You need family, and I see that the BAU is your family, but they have a right to get to know where you come from, and where your root lies. Otherwise, it's all in the surface. You need to let them see all of you. I appreciate that you're wanting to make sure that no harm come our way, but we'll be okay. I promise!"

"I know Bean. I'm just scared. You're all I've got, and I would hate for anything to happen to you because of the profession I chose."

"Everything will be alright Bug, I promise."

Derek watched their exchange from where he sat, he was almost certain that he was not the topic of their conversation. He found himself envious of how her guard was always down when she spoke with Luke, as though she knew he could protect her from anything. From the stories he had heard that night, it was Luke that got her through her parents death. So much of her past was still a mystery to him, just as his was to her only months before. Though they were close, there was so much they didn't know about each other.

"Their bond is a little daunting to watch in action isn't it?" Lorelai said quietly coaxing him out of his trance. Derek smiled guiltily.

"A little,"

"I've been around it for about 15 years and I'm envious of it. I'm an only child so it took a little while to get used to the sibling bond thing. I know their not blood, but that's what they are. Luke's Mom and Pen's Mom were best friends and had been since childhood. When Luke's mother passed away, Pen and her parents were there for him and his sister Liz, which is Jess' Mom. A few years later, Pen's parents followed. A few years after that, Luke's father passed away. There were so many tragedies in such a short span of time, and they've only had each other to rely on. I love Pen, she's the closest thing I have to a sister with the exception of my best friend Sookie. I learned very early on that she came with the package and I found that I didn't mind a bit because there was enough love there. It sounds corny, but it's true. Despite their closeness, I have never felt anything less the most important. I don't know how they do it, but they do. You're a little overwhelmed because it's coming from left field. From what Pen's told me, with the exception of the girls, you were the one she was closest to, and I'm sure seeing someone sit where you normally sit in her life is a little disconcerting. I would bet you're feeling a little territorial right now," Lorelai teased lightly earning a smile from Derek.

"I was, but not anymore. Well, maybe not as much. I guess it feels a little weird to see that she's so close to someone else, when I've always taken it for granted that she always put me first."

"That hasn't changed, you'll find that she still does Derek. It just may not be as plain and simple as it once was, but you're still in her top priority list." Derek looked at Lorelai with gratitude, she offered him a window and he appreciated that.

Penelope caught Derek's gaze in her direction as she and Luke spoke, she may not be a profiler but she knew that he felt threatened. She smiled as she saw Lorelai join him, and found him relax as she spoke. She made a mental note to hug her friend for whatever reassurance she managed to offer him.

She crossed the room to place herself on the couch between Gideon and Hotch. She looked from one boss to the other and grinned at them both,

"Thanks so much for tonight you guys. I really appreciate it. A part of me feels like I owe you an apology for not being completely truthful about my life."  
"You didn't lie Penelope, you simply wanted to keep your family sacred, and no one can fault you for that, least of all me." Gideon said reassuringly.

"We understood your reasons for it, but we need you to know that we're here, we're your family too and if you're in the middle of something, we don't want to know it because you've dropped from the face of the earth and ran to your safe place, we want to know because you trust us enough to tell us." Penelope knew what Hotch was referring to and nodded.

"That part of my life is just so hard to explain that I just don't. I rely on Luke because he just knows. It's not for the lack of trust, but for the pain that comes with recollection." Hotch patted her hand in understanding.

"I think we should probably call it a night. You guys still have work tomorrow." Luke suggested as he looked at the time and saw that it was past midnight.

"I guess you're right, but I have it on good authority that poker has been played in this house well into the 4 o'clock mark, and agents have managed to crawl into work early the next day." Hotch teased as Emiily, JJ, Reid and Penelope looked at each other sheepishly before smirking.

"See what happens when you fraternize with management?" Reid mumbled to Penelope earning a smack from Emily.

JJ hopped into Reid's car, Gideon with Morgan, Jess, April and Rory with Penelope, while Hotch stayed to help Emily clean up. Sookie and Jackson had long since gone home to their kids in Stars Hollow. Penelope had settled the girls in the spare room and gathered pillows, sheets and a blanket for Jess on her couch. She had tucked both girls in and as well as Jess when her phone beeped.

"Hey handsome, you home?" she asked affectionately.

"Err, not really no." he answered,

"Where are you?" she asked worriedly,

"Front steps of your apartment building."

"Let me check on the kids and I'll be right down."

Penelope checked on the girls who were dead asleep, and just as she was about to walk past Jess he spoke,

"And where do you think you're going young lady?" Penelope chuckled,

"I'll be right outside Dad."

"Well you make sure you make it quick, this is not an hour for a respectable girl to be parading in her pyjamas with some boy." He continued in his best mock stern voice earning a hearty laugh from Penelope. She bent down and dropped a kiss on his head,

"Thank you! Sleep well. I'll be back soon. I promise." Jess waved and snuggled into a comfortable position as Penelope slipped out of her apartment.

She found Derek sitting on her front porch, lost in the abyss of his thoughts. Lovingly she placed a hand on his shoulder as she sat down. Derek looked up and smiled, she was dressed in her famous cupcakes pyjamas with matching pink hoodie. She had her hair gathered in a messy pony tail, and to him, she had never looked more beautiful.

"Hey Baby, I didn't mean to deprive you of your sleep. I just took a chance to see if you were awake."

"And I am. So are we really going to do this now?" she asked.

"What? Define our relationship?" he teased.

"That's one way to put it."

"You up for it?" he searched her eyes for an answer.

"Sure. If you're game, I am. Who starts?" she challenged keeping her tone light despite the butterflies in her stomach and jumping jelly beans in her heart.

"I've always known that I loved you. Always!" he declared holding her gaze,

"Regardless of who came along, it was you that I looked forward to speaking at the beginning and at the end of each day. No matter how bad the case we were working on was, the one thing that made it better was you on the other end making me laugh. Hearing your voice was enough, hearing it made the day bearable no matter how gruesome it was. Pen, you're my best friend, and though I know you now question that with my behaviour the last few months, I need you to know that you are, and not being able to be talk to you as we once did is probably the hardest thing I have ever had to endure. Lady, whether you know it or not, believe it or not, you are my God given solace, and hearing your voice is the only thing that gets me through the day, and if I could make it so, I would make sure that you never ever stop speaking to me." Penelope caressed the hand she held in hers, allowing him to carry on.

"When everything came out in Chicago, I was embarrassed and ashamed. I didn't want you to know what he did to me, because even though I know in my heart it didn't matter to you, I didn't want you to look at me through the eyes I feared you would, but that's all I could see, so I pushed you away. I knew I loved you, and that I wanted to be with you, I just couldn't comprehend why you would want to be with someone like me after you found out, which is stupid I know, but I plead stupidity to the third degree. Maybe it was easier to assume you would reject me for that, than to take the chance that you may not feel the same about me. I'm really sorry Pen."

"Firstly, you're a twit… how you could not know that I loved you is beyond me. Derek, I have always loved you too, but never in my life did I dare to imagine that you would ever feel the same way. Before you scoff at me, I have been around long enough to see who makes the Derek radar. I have been around your flirting and your moves long enough to discern the type. As much as I knew you loved me, you were never attracted to me like that."

"So you think…" he piped in with a roll of his eyes.

"Honey, you never actually gave me any reason or indication for a single moment that you saw or even thought of me that way. I'm a genius to my own accord, I'm no Reid, but even I couldn't suspect how you felt. I was always just 'Garcia', the techie geek you spoke to and flirted with on the other side of the phone."

"You've never been just that Pen."

"I know that now."

"So…"

"So???"

"What would you say if I propose we try an 'Us'?"

"As in try before you buy?" she threw in dryly.

"I'd tell you I want to be with you for the rest of my life right now if I didn't know you'd panic and bolt in a heartbeat, so I am proposing baby steps. A date, dinner, movie? Please!"

"Okay." She replied with obvious hesitation.

"Really?" Derek asked with a twinkle in his eye that she couldn't quite help but be excited too.

"Sure, there's no one else I could think of that I would trust my heart with."

"I promise to be careful with it."

"I'll hold you to that Agent Morgan."


	9. Letting you see me

_**Hope you guys are enjoying the story. In all honesty, I have no idea where this is going and I am just allowing the creative juices to take over. It's amazing what comes during graveyard shift. Let me know if you like the chapter! Off home to get some sleep! Till tonight again! =)**_

_**Thanks so much for the feedback **__**Leigh59**__**, I'm so glad you're enjoying it. **_

_**Savin' Grace**__**, I appreciate the forgiveness. I was going to leave this on a cliff hanger but I figured you'd hunt me down. **_

Penelope and Derek remained in her front steps sitting side by side, heads drawn close together talking. She began to tell him about her childhood, and where Luke fit in to all that. What a huge instrument he was to who she was, and why she loved him as much as she did.

"Even when my parents were alive, with the exception of them, no one believed in me the way Luke did. He never pushed, just encouraged. He never failed to tell me how much faith he had in what I could accomplish. When Mom and Dad were killed, I went underground. I just couldn't' cope, Luke and Uncle Will searched high and low for me and brought me back. Which I'm glad they did as a couple of years after that Uncle Will was diagnosed and shortly passed away. I don't think I could have ever lived with not being around for those last few years with him." Derek enclosed her hand with his and brought them to his lips.

"I wish I could have met your parents."

"They would have loved you. My Mom especially, she's the romantic. Dad is a lot like Luke, very stoic, but soft."

"Is it dumb that I am very envious of Luke?"

"Oh hon, there's nothing to be envious of. Luke is a part of my childhood, he's family and we'll be there forever, but my future is yours for as long as you want it."

"You're never going to get rid of me, you know that right?"

"That's good, I've grown quite attached to you."

After another hour they had reluctantly parted at Penelope's insistence, she didn't have to be at work tomorrow but they both had a full day ahead.

"Dinner tomorrow?" he murmured hopefully in her ear as he hugged her goodbye.

"Sounds good handsome, call me when you get home so I know you got home okay."

"Baby, I live three blocks away. You should get some sleep, you have three active young ones to deal with all day tomorrow."

"A few minutes won't kill me. I just want to make sure you get home okay."

"Okay," he relented as he kissed the tip of her nose.

Despite the late night, she was awake early the next morning and prepared a full breakfast for Jess, Rory and April.

"Pen's famous waffles, we may never leave." Rory teased as she emerged from the bathroom first. Penelope smiled,

"Well seeing as I hardly get to make you guys breakfast you're welcome to stay as long as you want. It's so nice having you guys around."

"It's been great getting to know your Team. I know Luke rests easier now knowing you're well looked after. They're great people."

"They certainly are."

"And what time did you walk in the door young lady?" Jess chuckled disapprovingly shaking his head trying to hide a smile,

"What do you mean, we all walked in together." April said looking at Jess as though he was crazy. Penelope raised an eyebrow at him, to which he merely grinned not answering April.

Penelope had a fun day with Jess, Rory and April. They each got to pick one thing they wanted to do and they squeezed it all in. They had agreed to meet Lorelai and Luke at the BAU in the afternoon so that they could all say their goodbye.

"It's good to finally meet you. I trust that you will take care of her." Luke said shaking Derek's hand.

"You have my word." He answered solemnly. Pen rolled her eyes catching the last bit of their exchange.

"Thanks for coming Bean." She said hugging him tightly

"Always a pleasure Bug," Derek stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist as they waved goodbye. Penelope leaned against him, both completely unaware of the obvious display of public affection. Though they were known for their outward affection for the other, there was a distinct intimacy that lingered. When Penelope caught JJ's raised eyebrow she dropped her gaze sheepishly and stepped out of his embrace, giving his hand a gentle squeeze before letting go.

"Well, shall we?" she said pointing towards the BAU building.

"Ah, Garcia you have the day off." Hotch reminded her obviously amused. Penelope's face flushed with embarrassment,

"So I do. Well, I guess I'm heading home. I'll see you guys tomorrow then. Thanks again for everything." Though she was embarrassed for obvious reasons, she wanted to convey her gratitude.

"Enjoy the rest of your day off." Gideon said placing a hand on her shoulder and giving it a quick squeeze.

"We'll just walk Pen to her car." Emily said with a smile.

"I think Penelope is capable of walking herself to the car. Everyone, back in the office," Hotch said ushering them towards the door earning a somewhat dirty look from both Emily and JJ. He gave Pen a wink as she grinned gratefully knowing that she couldn't really fend of the girls any longer and the moment they get upstairs Morgan would be subjected to their interrogation.

Penelope went home and straightened up. She and Derek had decided on a quiet night in and she had offered to cook him dinner as she had the rest of the afternoon off. She made the necessary preparations and had the roast in the oven as she took a long hot bath. By the time Derek arrived, her apartment was dimly lit, table set, Penelope in her jeans and sweater, hair loose reading a book curled up on the couch. He had let himself in as instructed and found her asleep. Smiling at the sight of her, it took all his strength not to gather her in his arms and never let go. He bent down and ran his fingers through her hair and watched her sleep. Penelope stirred feeling his presence,

"Hey Handsome, how was the rest of your afternoon?" she asked with a smile taking her his hands in hers before bringing it to her lips. She shuffled closer to the edge of the couch making room for him to which he obliged. As he got himself situated she shuffled against him till they were both snug.

"How do you think my afternoon went with those two? Vultures I tell you. You're in for it tomorrow, just be warned." He replied as he placed his arm under her head so that she could be comfortable.

"Don't worry, I have 10 missed calls since I left the office that I haven't replied to so I know what I'm in for. I love the girls, but I just wanted a day where I could cherish the moment before we discuss it like a bunch of teenage girls." Derek laughed and simply drew her closer.

"Are you hungry?"

"A little, but I can wait, I'm not particularly wanting to move right now. Dinner smells amazing though." He said nuzzling her neck.

"Hmm, I can see that this is a dangerous position." She said chuckling not entirely minding. She turned to face him wrapping her arms securely around his neck and burrowing her face in his neck. Derek pulled her as close as humanly possible against him, his arms tight around her, their legs intertwined.

"I think I may have just found my favourite place in the world." Penelope murmured with a content smile.

"Don't you fall asleep on me," he teased kissing her closed eyes.

"No sleeping, just snuggling. You complaining?" she asked raising an eyebrow at him.

"Never, I've got you exactly where I want you."

It took some time, but they eventually made it off the couch to have dinner. As they ate, Derek began to talk about his childhood. Things he had never told her before or anyone for that matter. All of a sudden there were so many thing he wanted to share with her, parts of his life he never even thought of sharing with anyone came to easily sharing with her. As he talked about the tough times, his father passing away and the events that followed Pen covered his hand with his from across the table, and when he had finished, she stood from where she sat and crossed over to him. She sat on his lap and wrapped her arms around him, cradling his head, whispering words of love and comfort. For the first time Derek felt something within him break, tears streamed down his cheeks as his grip around her tightened.

"It's okay Baby, let it out. It's over. It's all over. He can't hurt you anymore. I'm here. I'll always be here. I love you. Nothing could ever change that. I promise." Penelope repeated the words softly over and over again in his ear, occasionally placing her lips on his head as he wept. When his tears have subsided, Pen made a move to stand wanting to give him space if he needed it, but just as she stood his hand grabbed hers as he looked up,

"Stay." Penelope nodded and resumed her position on his lap.

They cleaned up in semi silence, and once they were done Penelope led him back to couch and handed him the remote. His arms possessively made their way around her as she sat beside him. Penelope lay her head on the crook of his arm as he ran his hand rhythmically up and down her side. They watched the end of an old movie, not so much as paying attention to the movie but relishing the fact that they were together. When he had fallen asleep she had gently moved him to lie down and draped a blanket over him, she lovingly ran her hand along his face before standing up. For the second time that evening, he grabbed hold of her hand and asked her to stay. Wordlessly she complied and lay down in the space he made for her. When his arms were securely around her, his eyes closed contently and he fell into a deep slumber.

The next morning Penelope woke up disoriented as she woke in her bed, alone. For a moment she thought that he may be in the shower or the kitchen, but when her eyes fell on the note on her bedside table she sighed and looked up at the ceiling. Derek had fully exposed himself the night before and been more vulnerable than he has ever been, and she knew that frightened him.

Penelope was interrogated by her girlfriends at breakfast which amused her to no end. Though she was worried about Derek, she vowed to give him the space he needed knowing that the previous night was rather intense for a first date. They were all sitting around the in the briefing room when he finally strolled in. She gave him an affectionate smile before resuming with assisting Gideon with the navigation of his laptop. Their new case had the team on the plane in less than half an hour, not really giving sufficient opportunity to even say goodbye, let along address his disappearance that morning.

That evening after numerous calls to the team, her direct line coaxed her out of her trance. She had been running stats for Reid and it was beginning to lull her to sleep. It was well past midnight, but there was no point in going home, and often times when they're in the middle of the case she crashed in her bunker.

"Garcia,"

"Hey Baby,"

"Oh Hey, you guys back at the hotel?" she asked.

"Yeah, you staying there the night?"

"It's easier to do things at a moments notice from here."

"I miss you." He confesses, bringing a smile to her face.

"That's nice to hear handsome. Why don't you try and get some rest."

"Listen Pen," he began, but she interrupted

"I know Sweetheart, and its okay. Get some sleep… Morgan,"

"Yeah Baby,"

"I miss you too." Derek smiled as he heard her hang up. He didn't know what came over him, but waking up and remembering the night before made him feel incredibly exposed all over again, and though he didn't regret opening up to Penelope, he wasn't prepared for the impact of such a confession and he appreciated that she understood.

Within a week their case had broken and the team had returned. As usual Penelope waited until they were back in the office before leaving for the day, even if it meant it was late in the evening. From the look on Emily and JJ's faces, they were all exhausted. They smiled at the sight of Pen, having missed her while they were gone. The boys watched as the three girls hugged each other hello, obviously glad to be back in the same place. They couldn't help but be in awe of how easily it came for the three of them to just fall into step with one another. Derek lingered in the background discreetly awaiting his turn. Penelope turned, surprised that he was standing by so close. She smiled as he pulled her into a hug. Running her hand along the back of his neck she told him softly that she had missed him. Sensing that he needed her she pulled away, and looked at him.

"Bunker?" Derek nodded and slipped out. Penelope stayed with her friends for a few minutes and made plans with the girls. Heading back to her bunker she passed Hotch,

"He ok?" she asked.

"He will be. He's got you." He answered confidently. Penelope smiled and dropped a kiss on his cheek before walking to her office.

Penelope found Derek leaning against the wall. She closed the door behind her and walked up to him wrapping her arms around him as tightly as she could, his firm grasp almost made it impossible to breathe but she didn't care. Her hand traced small patterns on his head as she remained in his embrace.

"Hey baby." She murmured nuzzling against his neck. Derek sat against her wall with Penelope on her side between his legs, his arms firmly around her, her head fixed on his shoulder.

"What happened?"

"Buford's trial is in a couple of weeks and they've asked me to testify. I know it's over, but I don't want to relive it."

"Baby, you have to. For those kids he's hurt, for the kids he could have hurt, for you who he took so much from. I know how much it hurts to relive the worst moments your life in a courtroom, I do. But you do what you need to put keep him behind bars. You're strong enough to do this. Trust me. You're one of the strongest people I know."

"Will you come with me?" he asked shyly,

"Try and stop me Derek Morgan." She replied with a smile.


	10. Surprise

With the complete support and blessing of Hotch and Gideon, Penelope had taken the time off to be with Morgan during the trial, they had flown into Chicago together and Penelope was immediately enfolded to the Morgan clan. Fran, Sarah and Des were aware of the role that Penelope played in Derek's life and that was enough to welcome her with open arms.

"It's nice to finally meet you Penelope. We have heard nothing but Penelope this and Penelope that for a very long time." Fran said as she gathered Penelope into a hug as they met at the airport.

"And even more so the last few weeks," Des piped in as Derek caught her in an affectionate head lock. She enjoyed getting to know the Morgan women, and though she had always known it, she could see that they were his back bone.

During the trial she sat beside him keeping his hand in hers on her lap, occasionally giving it a firm squeeze as if to remind him that she was there. In the weeks leading up to the trial Derek was plagued with nightmares and they came more and more frequently upon their arrival in Chicago. It was taking its toll on him and Penelope grew even more worried. When he awoke from his nightmares, she would wake up and gather him in her arms and lay awake with him till he fell as sleep again. More often than not, it worked, and if it wasn't for her constant presence, he would never get any rest. Penelope had broached the subject of asking his therapist to subscribe something to help him sleep but he refused. She had hoped that once Buford was rotting in jail, he would be freed. Till then, she could only hold him.

Fran Morgan saw first hand just how much Penelope cared about her son. How selfless she was when it came to his needs. She could see that Penelope was just as exhausted as Derek was, and that was because she could hear her mumbling to her son in attempts to comfort him from the nightmares that haunted him. There was a deep bond and love between them that brought her comfort that he was in good hands.

By the time the trial had finished, they were all exhausted, with Derek's testimony and evidence gathered by the BAU, Buford was put away for life with no parole. Penelope sighed with relief as the verdict was made.

"Baby, why don't you stay with your family for a couple of extra days? It's been an intense couple of weeks with the trial and you need some down time." Penelope suggested running her hand up and down his back as she sat beside him on the couch.

"Will you stay with me?" he asked.

"I would love to honey, but Hotch needs me back at the BAU. But I do think you need to stay for a couple of days. For your Mom, sisters and for you, I know how hard it was for you to do a recount of what happened, especially with them in the room, and you need to face that head on. They're your family. Spend time with them, nothing's changed. You're still their brother, and you're still Fran's baby boy. I need you to make new memories with them post this, for you, for them. Put this behind you." She said gently. Derek knew she was right. Having to recount what Buford had down to him all those years ago was hard enough, and having his mother and sisters hear it, almost killed him.

The following morning after saying goodbye to his mother and sisters, Derek had taken Penelope to the airport.

"Saying thank you seems stupid and inadequate, but thank you. I don't know what I would have done without you P." he whispered in her ear as he hugged her goodbye.

"Always baby. I'll always be there. I'll see you in a few days."

"I love you P."

"I love you to Derek."

Expecting the girls at the airport Penelope was surprised to see Gideon standing at arrivals waiting for her.

"Sir, what are you doing here?"

"Hotch and I thought after the couple of weeks you've had you could use a down played welcome home." Garcia let out a small smile at his answer,

"My boss's ever the profilers." She replied biting her lower lip. Jason who could see her walls begin to crumble took her in his arms and held her as she wept. She couldn't admit to anyone just how hard the last couple of weeks have been, so focused on making sure that Morgan was taken care of, that his needs were met. She couldn't tell anyone how being in a courtroom haunted her. Even when she spoke to Luke on the phone she couldn't get into details. She didn't even know how to tell Derek that being in the courtroom with him brought back the worst moments of her life. Jason was in awe of her strength. It was easy to underestimate her at first glance, but knowing what he knew of her past and what she had to endure with Morgan the last couple of weeks, he would never make that mistake again. When she had finished, he simply handed her his hankie, picked up her luggage and led her to the car, knowing she simply needed to let it out, that if she needed or wanted to talk about it, she would. Penelope appreciated the space he gave her, and the comfort he provided unconditionally.

"You have the night to yourself. We told the girls you're not coming back till tomorrow. So take day to do what you need to. I'll come and get you in the morning to take you to work." Gideon said as he pulled up in front of her apartment. Penelope smiled at him gratefully. Seeing as it was still morning she had a whole day to herself without interruption,

"Thank you!" she said planting a kiss on his cheek before jumping out of his car and giving him a quick wave before entering her building. Penelope dropped her luggage at the door and headed straight to her couch and collapsed. She dropped Morgan a quick message to let him know that she arrived safely. She thought about unpacking but her body refused to move relishing the fact that she was home. When she had finally convinced herself to get off her couch she quickly unpacked, took a bath and jumped into her favourite pair of pyjamas. Not bothering with food she slipped into her bed and under her covers and closed her eyes and for the first time in weeks, she fell into a deep slumber. She slept for over eight hours and only stirred when her phone started vibrating on her bedside table.

"Hey baby," she greeted groggily not opening her eyes,

"Hey Princess, I didn't mean to wake you. Go back to sleep."

"You sure?" she asked sleepily,

"Yeah baby, sleep. Love you."

"Love you too." She answered before hanging up and falling back asleep.

"Pen sleeping?" Fran asked as Derek hung up.

"Dead to the world, she hasn't been getting much sleep with me around waking her with my nightmares."

"I don't think she minds." Fran said patting his hand with hers.

"That's Pen."

Pen slept through the night and woke up just in time for a shower and cereal before Gideon arrived. The sleep had done wonders for her, and it was exactly what she needed. Gideon could clearly see what a good night's sleep had done for her.

"Thank you so much for last night, I literally slept for 18 hours." She admitted sheepishly,

"Which is exactly what you needed,"

After exchanging hugs with the girls and Reid, Penelope slipped into Hotch's office to say a quick thank you before heading to her bunker, almost afraid to see what state Kevin Lynch had left her office. Penelope smiled as she saw that nothing was touched and smiled knowing that Hotch would have more than likely threatened Kevin to keep her office just as he found it.

Penelope, JJ and Emily went out for a long awaited lunch together that afternoon and caught up on what was going on in each other's lives. Though she spoke to them regularly while she was in Chicago, it was never in detail, and she missed hanging out with them.

"When does Morgan come home?" JJ asked.

"This weekend I think, I was thinking of driving to the Hollow if he's going to stay in Chicago till Sunday. What are you guys up to? If you don't have anything planned did you want to come with?"

"Hotch and I are taking Jack to the Zoo this weekend." Emily said apologetically

"Spence and I are going to Nevada to visit his Mom."

"Well look at you two all family oriented." Penelope teased.

"Says she who's been in Chicago with said boy and his family," Emily retorted playfully.

"I'll be home Sunday afternoon. The twins wore me out and got me to agree on watching their dance recital."

"Awww, Uncle Derek that'll be fun."

"You hanging out with the girls this weekend?"

"Nope, they've both got plans so I was thinking of driving to the Hollow and bumming out there. It's April's weekend at Luke's and she's been begging to hang out."

"That sounds good. When will you be home?"

"Sunday early evening, but I can aim earlier and pick you up at the airport."

"You sure?" he asked,

"Of course, just let me know once you've booked your flight."

"So how goes it with the boy?" Luke asked as he handed her a mug full of hot chocolate. Pen had agreed to stay in the Danes' new home instead of Luke's Diner, mainly because April had begged her.

"Good, I mean he's dealing with a few things right now, but as for us, I think we're doing good so far."

"Then why do you have your waiting for the other shoe to drop face on like you're scared."

"Maybe because the thought that this could potentially blow up in my face scares the living daylights out of me, that could be why?" she answered honestly.

"It's been so intense that it frightens me. I'm so used to being single and all of a sudden I'm not, and that I'm with a guy who is one of my closest friends. The possible fall out unnerves me a little."

"Oh P, just enjoy it. We can't predict what will happen. You just need to live each moment as it comes."

"I'm trying Bean, I really am."

As the weeks turned to months, the relationship between Morgan and Penelope grew from strength to strength and they learned to trust each other in all aspects of their lives.

"Hey Hon, I'm going home. It's been a long day and I just want to crash." Pen called out as she passed the bull pen where he was slugging through his paperwork. Morgan looked up,

"You okay Baby?" he asked rising from his chair.

"Yeah, just tired," she said reassuring him.

"You're doing drinks with Taylor tonight right?" Penelope confirmed. Taylor was transferred to LA not long after Penelope and Derek got together, but they remained friends. For the most part Penelope didn't have any issues with that.

"Yeah, it'll be a quick one though so I'll see you at yours soon." The invitation to drinks was extended to her but seeing as she was never friends with Taylor, she didn't really see a point in going.

"Oh hon, take your time. Really. I'll see you when I see you." She said kissing him on the lips before turning to go.

"Hey, Pen go already?" Emily asked as she came from the direction of her friend's office.

"Yeah, she said she was tired."

"Again?" she asked out loud.

"What do mean?" he inquired.

"She's been tired a lot lately. Though she doesn't complain, she's been a little sluggish. We were hanging out at mine the other night on the couch and in mid conversation she fell asleep, which isn't like her." Morgan's forehead furrowed with worry, realising that Emily was right.

"I might head on to yours while you're out and check in on her."

"That would be great Em. I won't be that far behind you, but if it's anything you call me okay."

"I will." Emily reassured him.

Twenty minutes later a knock on her door forced Garcia to roll off her couch, grumbling she opened the door and found Emily standing before her holding a paper bag in her hand.

"I may have a theory on why you're so tired all the time."

"Don't bother, I already know." Penelope answered ushering her friend in before collapsing back on the couch.

"And?" Emiy pressed,

"And if those things that I presume you have in that bag are accurate, then yes you guessed correctly." Emily squealed and threw her arms around her friend.

"Are you excited?"

"Personally, I'm ecstatic. I'm going to have a baby, Derek's baby."

"Then why the face?"

"This fast forwards things. I don't want us to rush into something he's not ready for just because it's the right thing to do. Not very long ago Derek Morgan expressed that he did not want to get married or have kids."

"Oh Pen, that was before."

"I know, but I want him to change his mind on his own, not because I gave him no choice."

"Talk to him about this."

"I will. I was going to do it tonight, how I was going to start it is still a mystery, but I was going to broach the topic tonight. Could you do me a favour? Can you not say anything to Hotch about it just yet? Not until I've talked to Morgan That and I wanted to get checked out and make sure that thing is accurate."

"Sure Hon, you got it."

Derek arrived at Penelope's later than he had anticipated and she was already fast asleep in her bed. He took a quick shower and slipped in beside her wrapping his arms around her, without waking up she snuggled against him and burrowed her face on the crook of his arm as she always did. Pen woke early the next morning curled up against him as she faced the window, his arms securely around her, his hands conveniently resting against her stomach.

"What goes on in that pretty head of yours Baby?"

"We need to talk, but I need you to promise me that you're not going to be a super hero about this, that you're going to tell me what you think despite how you may think I may feel about it." Penelope turned around to face him,

"I think I'm pregnant, well I took the test, a few of them actually and it said yes. I haven't been to the Doctor yet, but I think 7 tests may be a reason to think that I am." Morgan's face broke into a grin,

"Really?" it was hard to miss the excitement on his face.

"So you're okay about it?" she asked hesitantly.

"Oh my God yes! Baby that's awesome news! Why would you think I would not be happy?" he asked kissing her forehead.

"A conversation where you declared you didn't want to get married and have kids." She answered.

"Baby, all bets were off the moment I told you I loved you. When I told you I loved you, that was with the intention of marrying you one day. I would have never gambled our friendship for a what if."

"Wow,"

"So when are we going in to get you checked out?" he asked excitedly.


	11. Sharing the news

Derek's excitement was surprising as well as contagious. Penelope watched him in amusement as they sat in her Doctor's waiting lounge unable to sit still.

"Baby, calm down" She said placing her hand on his knee. Derek stopped moving and grinned at her sheepishly.

"Sorry."

"It's okay," she replied giving his cheek a quick kiss before returning to her book. As she read she absently played with his hand,

"Penelope, the Doctor is ready for you now." The reception called out pleasantly. Penelope and Morgan stood to their feet and followed her into the Doctor's office.

"It's nice to see you again Penelope. How are Luke and Lorelai doing? I haven't seen them since the wedding."

"They're well. Dr H, this is my partner Derek Morgan." Penelope said introducing Derek.

"I trust you're taking good care of our girl." Dr Halsey stated making it known that he was checking Derek out causing an embarrassed Penelope to blush.

"Uncle Teddi!" she admonished.

"Dr H, is a family friend. He, my Dad and Luke's Dad all grew up together. He looks out for Luke and I, as you can see." Penelope explained as Theodore Halsey simply shrugged his shoulders grinning.

"Pleasure to meet you Sir, and you have my word, I am taking good care of her." Derek said solemnly.

"Don't mind him Derek, he likes to stir."

"So I have the results of your blood test and I am delighted to confirm that you Ladybug, are indeed pregnant." Dr Halsey announced somewhat proudly. Happily Morgan brought the hand he held to his lips.

"Now, I have referred you to a really good friend of mine Dr. Carly Manning, she's a great OB, I've spoken with her and she's expecting you."

"Thanks Dr H,"

"Now from what you've told me I would say you're nearing the end of your first trimester, but Carly will be able to confirm that for you for sure."

"Wow!" Derek breathed out in amazement, as Penelope smiled happily.

"So next time you're headed to the Hollow let me know and I can head on down there and we can do dinner with Luke and Lorelai."

"That sounds great. It's good to see you Kiddo. We don't see each other nearly enough for two people who live in the same city."

"I know, how about dinner next week?"

"That sounds good. I look forward to getting to know you young man. Whoever catches the Ladybug's heart has to be extremely special." Penelope rolled her eyes and gently nudged Derek towards the door before turning to hug Teddi goodbye.

"I'll call to set up the day and time, and thanks Uncle T."

"Pleasure Bug, your parents would be so happy right now." He whispered

"I know. I really miss them. Especially for the big things." She admitted tearfully

"They're here, they're always with you." He soothed giving her another squeeze before leading her out the door. He turned to Derek and shook his hand,

"You take care of her."

"I will." Derek promised as he draped an arm around Penelope's shoulders.

"You okay?" he asked as they buckled in. Penelope nodded and simply leaned her head against the head rest.

"I'm just a little tired, and hormonal. Luke and I tend to limit our Uncle Teddi encounters because as much as we love him, he reminds us of what we've lost. Growing up Uncle Teddi was a constant presence. He was the cool Uncle who let us get away with everything. He diagnosed Uncle Will's cancer. He was there with us when Uncle Will died. He never married and never had kids, Luke, Liz and I were the closest thing he had to kids, and after our parents died, he took it just as hard. He tried to be there for us and certainly looked out for us, but I think he found it just as hard to be in our presence, just as we found it hard to be in his."

"Hence he calls you Ladybug."

"Yeah, my Dad called me Ladybug. He and Luke managed to pick it up."

"I'm sorry Baby girl."

"I'm okay, I just miss them."

"What do you say we take a drive down to Hartford and tell your parents about the little slugger, and drive through Stars Hollow on the way home?" Penelope's eyes filled with tears,

"I'd love that." Derek gave her knee a gentle squeeze and started the car.

It was early Saturday morning, which meant they had plenty of time to make it to Hartford, Stars Hollow and back. Penelope fell asleep half an hour into the drive, so that he didn't have to wake her he called Luke to ask him where her parents were buried.

"Hartford Grove, everything okay?" Luke asked.

"Yeah, everything's good. Listen, we were thinking of dropping by on the way home if you're not too busy."

"Not at all, give me a quick call when you're on your way so I can grab Lorelai and we can do late lunch or early dinner?"

"Sounds great, we'll see you soon."

When they arrived at Hartford Grove Derek caressed her cheek coaxing her out of her sleep,

"Hey Baby Girl, we're here." Penelope stirred and opened her eyes,

"How did you know?" she asked confused,

"I have my ways, let's go." Derek got out from his side quickly enough so that he could open the door for her and help her out. Derek then opened the rear door and pulled out an arrangement of colourful flowers that he had picked up along the way.

"You thought of everything. Thank you Honey." She said gratefully wrapping her arms around his waist. Derek placed his lips on her head and returned the embrace. Hand in hand Penelope led him to her parents grave, she made a point of visiting every time she was at Stars Hollow. She had spent many hours sitting by their grave talking to them, and telling them about what was new in her life.

"Hey Daddy, Mom, this is Derek. The one I've been telling you about. We just wanted to let you know that you're going to be grandparents. I wish you guys could be here. I can certainly imagine the degree of spoiled this child would be, but I am confident that Luke and Uncle Teddi would do you proud in your place."

"How did you want to do this?" Derek asked as they pulled in at the Diner.

"Quickly?" she answered

"Just to warn you, he's probably not expecting the baby announcement. So in case he jumps ahead, ignore him." Derek smiled suspecting that Luke and Lorelai were waiting for an engagement announcement.

"Sure baby girl."

"Hey Bean, miss me?" Penelope called out as she breezed through the Diner doors. Luke grinned at the sight of her and excused himself from his patrons to give her a hug.

"Bug, it's good to see you. Derek, you too." He said reaching to shake Derek's hand,

"You too man."

"Hey Bean, do you think Caesar could cover you for a few minutes. I just need to talk to you a sec…pantry?"

"Ugh sure. Caesar, cover me." He yelled out to Caesar.

"Derek?" Pen said looking at him,

"You go on ahead, I'll be here."

"You sure?" she asked.

"Of course." Derek watched as Luke followed Penelope into the pantry.

"So…" she said turning around to face him,

"So…" he mirrored.

"I'm pregnant."

"You're what? Oh my gosh P that's awesome." He said pulling her into a bear hug.

"That's fantastic, how far along are you?"

"Uncle T thinks I'm nearing the end of my first trimester but I won't know for sure till I see his OB friend next week."

"Hence the trip to Hartford." He guessed,

"Yeah, his idea."

"Good boy!"

On the drive home, after enduring a meal with a very excited Lorelai Penelope covered Derek's hand that sat on the gear stick.

"Baby, what do you say we fly to Chicago in the morning and tell your Mom and sisters? While we're there, you can introduce me to your Dad. We have enough frequent flyer points to swing it."

"Just for the day?"

"Well, overnight at least. We have Monday off remember? I don't want to tell your Mom over the phone, and I know you're dying to tell her. I think she'd love it if we did it in person."

"She would. Yeah, that sounds great. We'll book when we get home. She's going to flip out." He said excitedly.

"Derek, Penelope, sweethearts what a wonderful surprise?" Fran Morgan exclaimed as she opened the door and found them standing before her. She gathered them both in a hug, obviously pleased to see them.

"Are you here on a case?"

"Errr no Mom, Pen?" he said looking at her.

"Baby, I think she'd love to hear it from you."

"Mom, you know those grandbabies you keep asking for?"

"Really?" Fran gasped looking from Penelope to Derek who both nodded in confirmation. Fran threw her arms around them both again happily,

"Oh my!' was all she could utter.

"I take it your happy Mom?" Derek teased earning a light smack on his arm. Fran wrapped an arm around Penelope.

"How are you feeling Sweetheart? How far along are you?"

"We're not sure exactly how far along but my family doctor suspects I may just be finishing my first trimester. I'm feeling okay. Hardly any morning sickness, I've just been tired mostly. It didn't even occur to me till I realised I had missed a couple of months that I could be pregnant."

For the next hour Fran lovingly asked questions as she beamed with obvious adoration for Penelope. She had accompanied them to the cemetery to visit Derek's Dad. She stood beside Penelope holding her hand as they stood back as Derek took a moment with his Dad.

"I'm so glad you're a part of this family Penelope. I want you to know that I may not be your Mother, and I know how much you miss her, and no one can ever replace her, but I'm here for you, any time of day." Fran murmured as she rest her chin on Penelope's shoulder as she stood behind her giving her a hug. Penelope turned to face her with tears in her eyes,

"Thank you. I really appreciate that. You're right, I do miss my mother, especially right now. I know how much she would have loved the idea of a grand child."

After dinner with Fran, Des, Sarah and her family, they had sent Penelope off to bed when they caught her trying to discreetly hide a yawn.

"So Baby brother when are you going to make an honest woman out of Pen?" Sarah teased.

"I want to, trust me. But right now, my making that suggestion simply looks like it's because I got her pregnant and she deserves more than that. She knows I want to marry her, when the timing is right, I'll ask her. For now we're concentrating on the baby and taking each day as it comes. I'd marry her tomorrow if she'd let me."

"Aww, our brother is growing up." Des teased jumping on Derek's lap throwing her arms around his neck.

"Oww. Gee Dessi, bony much. You'd think with the amount you eat you'd get some padding." He retorted with pure affection.

Penelope and Derek flew back after brunch with Fran who promised to visit soon. Penelope headed straight for his couch when they arrived at his place. Derek took out a pair of his sweat pants and her favourite jersey and handed it to her.

"Baby, why don't you get comfortable? We'll hang here for the rest of the day."

"You sure?" she asked somewhat guiltily. Being pregnant made her so tired that the littlest things exhausted her.

"Of course, go on, Get changed." Penelope didn't argue and got changed. When she emerged from his room she saw that he had pulled extra pillows and a blanker from the hall cabinet. He had set up the DVD's on the table for her to choose from, along with Water, glasses and popcorn.

"In case I haven't said it today, I love you." She said smiling at him.

"I love you too Princess. Now come and get comfortable. I'm going to change into my sweats." Penelope got herself situated. A few minutes later Derek found her snuggled beneath the blankets. He slipped in behind her pulling her against him, his hands resting on her stomach. Penelope loved how his hands automatically found their way to her stomach every chance he got. Even as he slept somehow his palm would end up on her belly.

"When did you want to tell the team?" she asked sleepily,

"Whenever you would like to Baby, it's your call."

"How about after the first check up?"

"Sounds like a plan."

"We need to tell them soon before Em implodes." Penelope joked as she had Em sworn to secrecy.

"That may be fun to see."

Penelope had an appointment with Dr Manning the following afternoon. Derek and Penelope both prayed that there wouldn't be a case that he would get called away. Thankfully it was a quiet day at the BAU which meant they were able to slip out separately in the afternoon. Leaving together would arise suspicions so they agreed to meet at the parking lot.

"Well Penelope, you're about 10 weeks pregnant. Are you ready to see your baby?" Dr Manning asked as she applied the gel on Penelope's stomach. Pen looked at Morgan who was giddy from anticipation and nodded. As soon as the paddle hit her stomach the room was filled with their baby's heartbeat. Dr Manning began to point out their baby's features and when Pen looked back at Morgan there were tears in his eyes.

"Baby she's beautiful." He murmured in amazement. Penelope chuckled,

"How can you be so certain she's a girl my love?"

After the ultrasound Pen and Morgan decided to head back to the BAU to tell their friends of their news. They walked into Hotch's office where he and Gideon were going through a few things,

"Hey, can we have a word?" Derek asked ducking his head in not letting go of Penelope's hand."

"Sure, come in guys." Surprised they watched Derek close the door behind them,

"Pen?" Derek prompted,

"Uh, we wanted you guys to be the first to know, I'm pregnant." Gideon and Hotch both stood to their feet beaming making their way to her.

"Congratulations." They said hugging her and shaking Morgan's hand.

"Wow!" Hotch said in obvious disbelief.

"I know, it's crazy. We're both really excited though."

A few minutes later they all came out of Hotch's office while a three faces watched expectantly from the bull pen. Without warning or reservation Penelope spoke,

"Soooo I'm pregnant," JJ and Emily jumped up from their chair and ran over to hug their friend while Reid followed close behind.

The whole team ended up going out to dinner that night to celebrate. Penelope couldn't help but feel extremely grateful that she was surrounded by so much love and that she was bringing a child into the world where there were so many people who loved him or her already wholeheartedly and unconditionally.


	12. Something to live for

_**Apologies for the delay…. Nightshift has been screwing with my brain and I got stumped. Hope you like this chapter, and Savin' Grace would I dare not aim for a happy ending? Thanks for the feedback you guys I really appreciate it. **_

To say that Penelope's pregnancy was well received, would be an understatement. Her team/friends had certainly rallied around her and had become more protective than ever before. A few days after announcing her pregnancy the team were called away to a case in LA. Derek was hesitant to leave Penelope, who assured him that she would be okay. Derek did his best to remain focused and to his credit, he did. But the moment he walked into the hotel, no matter what time of day it was, he called Penelope who was instinctively awaiting his call.

"Hey Baby," Penelope answered somewhat distractedly.

"You okay?" he asked

"We're fine hon, I'm just in the middle of cross referencing the foster parents of the victims to see if there's any link between them."

"Baby it's late."

"And we're in the middle of a case, nothing's changed Derek. I'm pregnant not dying." She replied somewhat exasperatedly. His constant fascination with her health was endearing at first but it was quickly reaching the point of insulting as though he implied that she was not concerned enough to look after herself. She was well aware of when she was tired, and she took the necessary break when it was called for. She loved their baby as much as he did and he had to learn that she knew her body better than he did.

"I just worry, you're so far away and…"

"I know you worry, and I love you for worrying, but we have another six months to go. If you keep going on this way you're going to drive yourself nuts, not to mention me. Trust me when I tell you that I know when I'm tired. I know when I can and cannot push myself. You forget that I love this kid just as much as you do and I would never let anything happen to him or her."

"I worry about you too." He added somewhat unnecessarily.

"I know that too."

After their conversation he forced himself to stop worrying. He knew that she was right, and that he was worrying unnecessarily. The case took almost two weeks to break, and Penelope could see that it was taking a toll on each one of her teammates. She spoke to the girls throughout the day as she did Morgan, she could hear it in their voice as they chased one lead after another. The case ended with a bomb in a car parked at the biggest underground car park in LA. One of the victims had been strapped to the passenger side of the car as a detonator. If she moved it would go off at the same time there was a timer that counted down. Derek had jumped into the car and drove it to the nearest park and when the time was almost up he had jumped out of the moving car with the passenger.

Penelope who had talked him through directions to the clearing gasped when she heard the explosion. Uncertain as to whether he had gotten out in time, she yelled his name.

"MORGAN!!!" she had only done it once, but the sheer devastation in her voice haunted those who had heard it. The rest of their team was still on the way to the clearing and couldn't confirm nor deny if their friend had made it out in time. For the longest ten seconds of her life she waited and then she heard his voice,

"Hey Baby, I'm still here." Letting out a huge sigh of relief she switched to auto pilot.

"Are you okay? Are you hurt? How's Monique?"

"She's okay. We got out in plenty of time." He said trying to reassure, her scream lingering in his head.

"They're okay Pen." Emily said offering her own reassurance as they saw Derek and Monique as they pulled in.

"Good. I'll let you guys get checked out. Garcia out."

Garcia threw off her head set and let out the breath she had been unconsciously holding in and finding herself completely overwhelmed she sobbed. A few minutes later her cell phone began to vibrate on top of her desk, pulling herself together she reached for her phone,

"Hey, are you okay? Have you been checked out?" she asked.

"Yeah Baby I'm fine. Just a few scratches."

"Good."

Derek knew well enough that as happy as she was that he was alright that she was mad at him.

"Baby girl, I need you to find me the nearest open clearing,"

"Why?"

"I need to drive the car out of here."

"Or you could wait for the bomb squad?" she interjected.

"Please…"

"Drive out of the building and I'll take you from there. How much time do you have left?"

"Four and a half minutes,"

Penelope set a timer beside her as she found the closest open space she could find in the area. Her heart thumped loudly against her chest as though it threatened to burst from her chest. She put her game face on and led him out of there. A few seconds before the bomb was due to explode, she heard him utter the words,

"I love you Baby!

Their phone conversation was short and a little abrupt as Penelope excused herself telling him that she was tired and was headed home. She knew the they were staying in LA the night to tie up loose ends and come home the following day, which was enough time for her to let her anger simmer. It didn't take a genius to figure out that Derek was in the doghouse. Penelope was polite on the phone, and there was very little affection from her voice as she spoke. Though it was part of the job, they knew why she was mad at him. Derek the superhero kicked in to save the day, which was admirable but not completely necessary.

When they arrived back at the BAU the following afternoon Pen was in her bunker. Emily had called when they landed to her know that they were on their way back. Her access to the surveillance announced their arrival. When they got back to the bull pen and their blonde tech analyst was not in sight the girls raised their eyebrows and wordlessly headed to the bunker.

"You had to expect that she'd be pissed." Hotch said interrupting Derek's thoughts.

"I know."

"You have to remember that it's not just you anymore. If anything happens to you, you leave her and your child behind. As admirable as your action was today, there were other options, and I don't blame your instinct, it's who you are and such a selfless reaction is an asset, but we're a team Derek. You forget that some times. You need to trust that as a team we can achieve the same outcome without you having to put only your life in danger." Derek could only nod, knowing that his superior had a point.

"Hello Mommy, did you miss us?" Emily asked as she breezed into Penelope's office. Penelope looked up and smiled up at her friends.

"Of course I did." She replied rising from her chair to greet her friends with a hug. The three them caught up for a bit talking about Baby Morgan and how he or she had become very instrumental in her mood and cravings.

"Em, sorry to break this to you but this kid hates Dirty Dancing."

"SACRILIDGE!" Emily scoffed in mock despair.

"Yeah, I put it on and while I was going through the footage, and put the head phones on my bump, and I swear to you the kid had me in the bathroom reeking. I put Bad Boys on because Derek left it here and he or she was happy as Larry."

"Well, I guess there's no doubting who the father is then."

"There's no accounting for taste I guess. Where is Superman?"

"He was summoned to Hotch's office upon our arrival. I'd say Hotch would be laying into him right now about team work, etc etc."

"Good!" Penelope replied unwaveringly. A few minutes later said man appeared at her door. Not exactly wanting to get caught in the crossfire JJ and Emily slipped out quickly.

"Hey Baby," he said bravely crossing the room to where she was. She gave him the once over and saw that he had a few scratches. He closed the distance between them and pulled her into a tight hug. Penelope who was clearly mad at him, remained unresponsive.

"I'm sorry Baby!" he apologized.

"You're sorry?" she repeated in disbelief, stepping out of his embrace/

"For what, willingly throwing yourself in front of unnecessary danger? You could have waited Derek. Bomb squad arrived two seconds after you drove off. You didn't even think, I mean take me out of the equation but you didn't even think for one second what would happen if anything happened to you. What you'd be leaving behind. It didn't even register. Then you had the audacity to blurt out you love me as some form last words. How dare you Derek Morgan!" she yelled, thankful that the girls had closed the door behind them

"You don't get to throw your life away and have the last word. I know that this job is your life and who you are and I am not asking you to stop being who you are, to compromise who you are by being less of an SSA. I would have just thought for a minute that we weighed into your decisions. Ah let's see, I won't put my life through unnecessary danger cause perhaps someone who loves me may not only miss me but be devastated if something happened to me. You once told me that you were nobody's hero, then stop acting like one." Her eyes were blazing with anger. Then in a flicker of a second her eyes began to fill with tears,

"Don't you know that if something ever happened to you…" but her words failed her. Derek's heart broke at the sight of her, fully feeling the consequences of his actions. He pulled her into his arms once more as she buried her face against his chest,

"I'm sorry Baby, I just didn't think. I promise you, not to not think anymore. I'm sorry P. You have to know that I would fight whatever comes my way just so I can come back to you and to our little one. You have to know that you two mean the world to me P."

"Then stop acting like you have nothing to live for." She said softly. Derek's arms around her tightened as he buried his face against her hair, savouring having her in his arms.


	13. You let me down

_**Hey guys, thank you to Leigh59, Jevans47403 & Savin' Grace for your faithful reviews. You guys certainly spur me on to write faster. This chapter took on a life of it's own… Savin' Grace you're probably going to hate me for certain parts, but I promise it will all be resolved… or not! Hehe!**_

As mad as she was at him, she didn't have the heart to send him home after he had driven them home. More often than not, they stayed in each other's place and though it was almost a given. He was afraid that she would tell him to go. Wordlessly they entered her apartment. After putting her things away, she started to get dinner organized. When Derek emerged from the shower he wrapped his arms around her waist as she chopped the vegetables for the salad. He lowered his head so his chin rest on her shoulder. Penelope placed her left hand briefly over his intertwined fingers before resuming to her chopping. Derek wasn't quite sure how to make it better. He knew that as hard as she tried not to be she was livid with him.

"Let's eat," she said interrupting his thoughts placing her hand on his cheek without looking at him. She knew that his mind was whirling, and that he was sorry, but she wasn't ready to let him off the hook yet. Their discussion was not yet finished. Derek nodded and brought the dishes to the coffee table, opting for the couch instead of the dining table. He put on an old movie and turned it on. As they ate dinner, both watched the movie absently, not particularly paying much attention. When she had finished eating Penelope had taken her plate to the sink and announced that she was going to take a shower and go to bed. Morgan could hear the shower and turned the TV off to wash the dishes. Penelope sat in the shower for awhile trying to clear if not drown her thoughts. She towel dried her hair as best as she could and climbed into bed exhausted. A few minutes later Derek entered the bedroom and found her seemingly asleep. He could tell by the dark circles under her eyes that she had not been getting much sleep. He slipped in beside her and draped his arms around her and pulled her close nuzzling her neck, happy to have her in his arms.

"You scared me. For those ten seconds where I didn't know if you had made it out, my whole life without you flashed before my eyes. Giving birth, birthdays, graduation, and I just couldn't breathe. I don't think you realize how much it would hurt if you weren't around. I'm not trying to guilt you in changing who you are, nor would I ask you to be less than who you are changing who you are. I just need you to take an extra moment to assess if it is truly necessary for you to fling yourself into such danger without a thought to anyone else. You know that if I knew there was no other way, I would understand, that it's a part of your job, but you have been single with nothing to account for, for far too long. I need you to remember that yes, I am here, but beyond me and more importantly you have a son or daughter relying on you too. I don't want our little slugger here to grow up without you."

'I hear you Pen, and I'm so sorry." He apologized, sincerity and regret lingered in his voice as he held her a little tighter, bringing his lips to her neck. Penelope reached over placed her hand on his cheek before closing her eyes and going to sleep. It wasn't lost to him that she hadn't looked at him since he had arrived, that under normal circumstances she would have turned around and buried her face in the crook of his neck and shuffled closer before going to sleep.

In the middle of the night Derek awoke from a heart wrenching scream beside him. Immediately he turned to Penelope who had sat up disoriented,

"Hey Baby, what's wrong? The baby okay?" Penelope nodded and lay back down with her turned away from him.

"I'm fine. Go back to sleep."

"That wasn't an I'm fine scream baby,"

"It's nothing. Just a nightmare, go back to sleep." She said hugging her pillow close to her as she forced her eyes shut, with no intention on sleeping,

"Pen,"

"Let it go, please." She begged quietly.

Derek sighed, unsure as to how to get through to her, and knew that she lost the certainty that she had that he would never leave her. When she thought that Derek was asleep, Penelope slipped out of bed and went to the living room. She sat along the windowsill with her knees and blanket brought up to her chin. She knew there would be no sleeping, as there hadn't been since the bombing incident. She worried for her baby, and had made an appointment with Carly to see if she could prescribe something to help her sleep that wouldn't affect her baby. She stared out the window, rubbing her stomach to soothe the active child in her womb. She knew she was part to blame for it's unsettledness. Derek stood by the door and watched her, unsure of what to say and do. He walked over to her and sat behind her, securing his arms around her as she leaned against him.

"How can I make this better for you?" he asked pleadingly, his heart ill equipped to see her so unhappy.

"I don't think there's anything you can do Derek. This is a me thing, I've been thinking about this for awhile now, and the only thing that's kept me from doing it is that I liked knowing that you guys were safe, that I knew your every move, but I think it may be time for me to hand in my badge. It's been hard looking at those images even before the little bambino, and now even more so. Though it brought me comfort to know your every move, it no longer does. It just scares me."

"Baby, I would hate for you to give up your career."

"I don't love it the way you do, or even the way Emily does. I've been thinking about this for awhile."

"You have?" he asked surprised.

"Yeah, when the girls came to Hartford, I was contemplating handing in my badge, and I promised them to think about it, and I have and I don't want it any more. Not at the risk of the health of my child. I have loved my time at the BAU, but it's time to move on. I'm not strong enough for it."

"Was that because of me?" he asked carefully.

"Partially, it seemed weird to be at the BAU with the way things were between us, but mostly I missed having the normal life, and just coming and going as much as I pleased. Seeing my family without being so frightened for their safety."

"What will you do?" he asked.

"Well, I've been thinking of setting up my own business for awhile now which will come in handy when Bambino here arrives so I can work from home. I've been really good with my finances, thanks to Luke so I'll be okay."

"Baby, we're in this together. Whatever you decide, I'll back you up. We'll make it work." Penelope nodded without a word,

"You still want us right?" he asked a little scared of her response. She paused and looked up at him,

"Of course I do, you just need to give me a little time."

"I'll be here for as long as it takes Baby Girl."

The following morning Penelope knocked on Hotch's door, glad to see that Gideon was there too so that she didn't have to have the same conversation twice.

"Sirs, I was hoping I could speak with you." She said politely as Hotch summoned her to sit.

"Firstly, I want to say thank you, for all that you've done for me, and how you've cared for me the whole time I've been here. I really appreciate it. The BAU is more than just my team, you guys are my family, so what I'm going to say to you is really hard for me to say and I hope that you will understand my reasons as to why it is necessary." Hotch and Gideon glanced at each other and braced themselves for the worst case scenario.

"I would like to hand in my resignation. I will stay on for as long as it takes for you to find a replacement, but I have to be honest with you, I cannot endure the horrific images that cross my screens anymore. I will not leave you in the lurch, and regardless of whether I still worked for the BAU, you know that my services will always be available to you."

Gideon placed a hand over hers and squeezed it.

"We're sorry to see you go, but allow so with our full blessing. You will be missed, but these doors will always be open to you. You're family, and nothing will change that." Hotch stood from his chair and walked over to her and enveloped her into a hug.

"You're an extraordinary person Penelope Garcia, it's been an honour and a privilege to be a part of your life."

"Right back at you Sir, it would mean a lot to me if you will both still remain an integral part of my life and little bambino here. I would love for him or her to be a part of Uncle Aaron, and Uncle Jason's life."

"Of course," Jason replied walking over to hug her.

As she emerged from their office, she spotted Reid sitting alone at his desk. She had left early that morning with the intention of talking to Hotch and Gideon. Derek had gone home in the morning to get a few things done.

"Hey Sweet Cheeks, you up for a Starbucks run with me?" she asked tousling his hair affectionately.

"Hey Garcia, of course." He said standing up.

"Listen Reid, there's something I have to tell you, and I wanted to tell you one on one. I haven't told the girls yet, and I will, but I wanted to tell you first." She was babbling and she knew it.

"Okay," he said somewhat hesitantly.

"I'm going to quit the BAU?"

"What? Why?" he stammered. Penelope placed a hand over his,

"I can't stand looking at what I look at anymore. It's giving me nightmares, and I am scared all the time, and it's affecting little slugger here. I am finding it hard to separate personal from professional, add in the hormones and it's just crazy. It used to comfort me to know your every move, to know where you guys are at all times, but now, it just makes me anxious."

"Wow,"

"I would have had to have gone on Maternity Leave, just think of it as an early maternity leave." She tried to appease.

"I'll miss you."

"Oh honey, I'm going to miss you. I think I'm going to miss you the most Scarecrow." She said leaning in to give him a hug. Reid loved Penelope like an older sister, and she grounded him. She loved him unconditionally and looked out for him. She understood him in a way no one else did. Perhaps it was their quirkiness that always made them gravitate to each other.

"Reid, just because I'm not in the office any more doesn't mean that I'm not going to be in your life any more. You're Uncle Spencer, and you're obliged to spend as much time with me and the little one as you can. When you're not on a case, I want you to come for movie nights. I'll still be here Reid, you have my word. I promise. You have to know that you mean a lot to me, that you're my best friend and I would never walk away from you."

Penelope needed him to hear her, and believe her. She didn't want him to think she was one more person who was abandoning him, which is why she wanted to talk to him first.

"I'm leaving the BAU, not you, not our friendship." Reid met her gaze and nodded, as though he understood what she tried so hard to convey. Reid swallowed the lump that had began to form in his throat,

"With all that time on your hands, I would expect Rocky Road cookies on the regular basis."

"You got it honey." She replied giving him one more hug before they headed back to the office.

"Hey, where have the two of you been?" Emily asked as they entered the bull pen.

"We had a secret rendeavous but don't tell Jayje." Penelope answered with a wink, her voice loud enough to carry over to JJ's office. Reid laughed and sat back at his desk.

"Hey Em, you got a minute. I need to run something by you and Jayje." Emily looked up in obvious concern and nodded. Together they walked into JJ's office and Penelope closed the door behind them.

"Hey, I need to tell you both something, and I hope you both understand." Emily and JJ exchanged a look,

"I've spoken to Hotch, and I have verbally resigned. I agreed to stay for as long as it took to find a replacement, within reason. Hotch and Gideon were really supportive and I hope that you will be too. I told you I'd think about it, and I have, and I can't do this anymore. I've been having nightmares, and I am anxious all the time. I can't filter what I see, and I need to, for both my sake and this baby."

"Hey Pen, it's okay. You know whatever your decision, you have our support. We love you, and will remain in your life regardless of whether or not your office is in the bunker. You know that right?" Emily said reassuringly as she draped an arm around her friend's shoulders.

"Em's right, our friendship goes beyond these walls." JJ said squeezing her hand.

"Thanks you guys."

"So what's Derek's take on this?" Em asked,

"He's worried, supportive but worried. I think he's a little freaked out that such a decision came after his little stint, but it goes beyond what he did. He was just the final shove I needed to do the something I have been so scared to do, for all the wrong reasons. Now that I have made the decision, I have complete peace."

"So when is your last day?"

"A couple of weeks, Hotch promised he will apply for a replacement as soon as possible, and I promised to train them and impart my wisdom so to speak."

"What are you going to do after?"

"Take a few weeks off, maybe head to Stars Hollow, spend more time there than the odd weekend here and there."

"And Derek?" JJ asked,

"Still in, I think he's scared that I may walk away from him, which I never would, but I am finding it really hard to be in the same room as him right now. I'm so angry at him even though I understood it's a part of his job. I guess it's easier to be mad at him."

"Oh honey, we understand." Emily said running her hand up and down Penelope's back, the sound of their friend's scream of despair still echoed in their minds and haunted them as much as it haunted her.

"Did you just tell Spence?" JJ asked.

"Yeah, I needed it to come from me, and I needed it to be just us. I needed him to hear that I wasn't abandoning him, I had to make sure he heard me."

"Good. I know how much he's going to miss you."

"As I told him, you guys are and will eternally be a part of my life, and this baby. You guys are his Aunts for goodness sake. It's your duty to spoil him or her."

"Hey Em, did she just give us permission to spoil her child?" JJ grinned at Em mischievously,

"Loud and clear, therefore she cannot complain when we do."

After a few more minutes the three of them emerged from her office, granted with eyes a little red from the inevitable tears that escaped during their conversation. Derek looked up and knew in that moment, that she had told them of her decision, which meant there was no turning back. He glanced over at Reid and understood why the young man had barely lifted his gaze from the reports on his desk. He guessed that Penelope had spoken to him first.

"Morning Baby Girl." He said rising from his chair to greet her.

"Hey Derek." She replied with a small smile. As tired as she looked, it was the happiest he had seen her in the last eighteen hours. She gave them a wave before heading back to her bunker. JJ placed a comforting hand on Reid's shoulder who looked up at her in surprise. He covered her hand with his appreciatively. A few minutes later Hotch had summoned them into the briefing room, Penelope included. As they sat around the round table Hotch began,

"I trust that Penelope has spoken to each of you with regards to her decision," every head in the room gave him a nod.

"At her request, we will replace her effective immediately. Kevin Lynch, whom you all know will be taking over her position. Penelope will stay till the end of the week to get Kevin up to date. Garcia, with your permission, I would like to keep you in the books for contractual purposes. So if ever you want to return to the FBI at any capacity, you may do so at your flexibility."

"Thank you Sir, that's more than generous." She replied gratefully.

"Kevin will be reporting to you this afternoon." Penelope nodded and reluctantly glanced at her team mates who all looked a little shell shocked. Penelope knew that Hotch wanted the handover to be quick and easy so that there was no lingering doom awaiting to befall them, but the looks on their faces made her wonder if that was the right thing for them. She guessed that they were expecting to have at least a couple of weeks if not a few to get used to the idea.

Friday came soon enough, and as much as her friends supported her decision, she could feel their attempt to distance themselves from her, which hurt but she understood it. She had packed up her belongings the night before so that Kevin could move all his gear in the following day. Morgan had sought her out when he didn't hear from her the whole day and found her in her bunker alone.

"Hey Baby."

"What you haven't joined the mutiny?" she asked quietly as watched the clock on her computer waiting for the clock to hit four o'clock. No one had said one word to her all day, and being pregnant and emotional made her take it personally regardless whether or not she understood it.

"Well in fairness, you're the one who hasn't wanted to have anything to do with me for days." He answered quietly,

"What do you want me to do Derek, pretend that everything is okay, that I'm not affected, that it's not hard to look at you. I'm mad at you, and you need to let me be mad at you because you were willing to risk your life regardless what you had to live for. How do you think that makes me feel? If you didn't want this anymore, you can just say so. You don't need to throw yourself into life threatening situations. It's four, and I'm done. I'll see you later. Send my regards to everyone else." Penelope said grabbing her bag to walk storm passed him. Shocked Derek barely had time to grab her arm to stop her.

"Let go of me Derek." She said angrily.

"That's what you think?" he asked sorrowfully.

"It's hard not to. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go. I won't be home this weekend. I suggest we both take the time to figure out if this is what we truly want, I know what you're saying but your actions spoke a thousand words. You will always be a part of this child's life, and I would never keep you away from him or her, but I don't have to come with the package." She shook her arm free and walked out leaving him completely dumbfounded. Penelope was willing to walk out without passing the bull pen, too tired to meet the cold shoulders she was receiving, when Gideon and Hotch emerged from the lift.

"We came to say Goodbye, you weren't going to leave without doing that were you?" Hotch asked suspiciously,

"No, I was going to pass by your office before I headed out. Thank you for the flowers and the bracelet, they're beautiful. Thank you for everything." She said giving them both a hug,

"Why don't you let us take you to dinner?" Gideon suggested knowing that despite the promises of support from her friends, they had fallen short caving to their own misguided convictions. Ever since it was announced that Kevin would be replacing her, the place had turned a little icy.

"Thank you Sir, but I have actually already made other plans and expected elsewhere this evening." She gave them both another hug and got in the lift. Penelope got into Esther and drove out of the BAU without a backward glance.

Gideon, Hotch and Derek made their way back to their office to find Emily, JJ and Reid huddled together at Reid's desk, as though contemplating their next move. They looked at the lift expectantly and were obviously disappointed when Penelope had not emerged. Their behaviour was ropable and they knew it.

"She's gone. Thank you for making her last moments at the BAU as hard as possible." Jason said in obvious disappointment.

"You had every opportunity to have made these last couple of days a memorable one for her, with everything that she had gone through, you could have given her one last good memory, instead she was met with your bruised and wounded hearts. We're all sad to see her go, she meant a lot to all of us, and instead of showing her that, and showing her that we are grateful for everything she had ever done for us, you all turned your back and acted like she was already gone. Like she didn't matter, what kind of friends, no what kind of family does that?" Reid, JJ, Emily and Derek hung their heads in shame.

Emily, Reid and JJ jumped to their feet in hope to catch her, but it was Hotch who had stopped them,

"She's not there anymore. You've all made yourselves perfectly clear with your behaviour the last couple of days. I don't care how hurt you were that she was leaving, she had every right to do what was right for herself and for that child. Yes we were all going to miss her, but she was leaving the BAU, not you, and now it's too late. You all need to deal with the consequences of your actions, all of you." He said looking at each one of them, his gaze held Derek's for a moment before he followed Gideon up the stairs, both superiors in disgust of their behaviour.

"Who's up for a drive?" Emily asked clearing her throat.

"She won't be home. I'd assume she's headed for Stars Hollow." Derek answered.

"Was that planned?" JJ asked,

"I don't think so. She asked me to stay at my own place the other night, so that's where I've been, and things here have been ultra weird, and now here we are. She said that maybe subconsciously I don't want to be in this relationship which is why I would willingly fling myself in the face of unnecessary danger. She wants us to take this weekend to find out if this is something we both want." Emily draped an arm around his shoulder,

"Who feels like a complete jack ass right now?" Emily asked out loud feeling incredibly bad for her behaviour which was almost justifiable only the hours before. Reid, JJ and Derek all raised their hands.

Penelope knew that they would expect her to head for the Hollow, and she would in the morning, but for that night she just wanted to be alone so she drove home and parked her car in the garage shut the door to conceal her presence. She had grabbed take away on the way home and set herself up for a movie night in. She had taken a shower and slipped into her favourite pair of pyjamas, determined not to think at all.

"Hey Luke, it's Derek. I just wanted to check in to make sure that Pen got in okay." Luke looked confused for a moment before recovering as quickly as possible.

"Not yet, but I'm sure she'll be here soon. Shall I get her to call you when she arrives?"

"No, it's okay. I'll call her again." Derek replied. Just as Derek hung up Luke called Penelope.

"Are you supposed to be on your way here tonight?" he asked. Penelope groaned. She had avoided Derek's calls and she should have known he would Luke to make sure she got there okay if she wasn't answering her phone.

"Sorry Bean, I should have pre warned you. I just wanted a night to myself, and if he knew I was around, he would be here, so I told him that I wasn't going to be home at all this weekend."

"I figured that's what it was and tried to recover as best as I could. You may want to drop him a text to let him know you've reached your destination before he listens to his instinct and deduce that you're not due here till tomorrow."

"I will, thanks Bean, looking forward to hanging out with you this weekend."

"Me too Bug, call when you're on your way so I can gauge what time to expect you."

"I will."

Penelope wrote a quick text to Derek that simply said,

"I'm here. I'm fine."

Derek who had already guessed that she wasn't on her way to Stars Hollow drove past her house to find that she had kept the shutters down so that no light seeped in or out, he checked the garage and found that Esther sat snug under her covers. He contemplated going upstairs but decided against it, giving her the night she needed to do what she needed to do to clear her head.

Penelope was asleep by seven that evening, not even finishing Willy Wonka and the Chocolate factory. For the first time in months, she had uninterrupted sleep. She awoke twelve hours later feeling completely refreshed. She cleaned up from the night before, took a shower and packed for a week. Suitcase on hand, as it was easier to navigate than her usual duffel, and lap top bag sat on her shoulder she locked up. She almost jumped a mile when she saw Reid, Emily and JJ sitting against the wall beside her door.

"What the?" she said placing her hand on heart as if to stop it from racing all of a sudden,

"Derek figured out you didn't go to Stars Hollow so we thought we'd come early this morning to see you before you left and say sorry for being complete asses these last couple of days. We didn't think it would be so soon, that we would at least have time to get used to the idea, and then all of a sudden you were going. There was no excuse for our behaviour, we were being a bunch of brats and we're really sorry Pen." Emily said speaking for the group.

"Ugh sure, I guess that makes sense. Well, thanks." Penelope said with a shrug unable to look at them. JJ, Emily and Reid looked at each other somewhat alarmed,

"I have to go, but thanks for dropping by." Pen said dragging her luggage with her as she turned to head to her car hoping that she stumped them enough for them not to follow her. She had unveiled Esther and had thrown her luggage in when they JJ, Reid and Emily emerged from her apartment building.

"I don't know what you guys want from me, absolution? It's yours. I'm tired of this, all of this. Having to explain myself, to all of you! Having to apologise for my every decision, you're supposed to be my friends and you're supposed to stand by me even if it doesn't make sense. You want to know the truth, then fine. The reason why I quit is because I have this condition with my blood pressure that makes it dangerous for the baby. Throw in what I see every day, and worrying constantly about whether one of you will get hurt, equals to stress, equals high blood pressure. If my blood pressure gets worse I will be confined to my bed for the rest of my pregnancy, which doesn't sound all together exciting for me. This child comes first, now I'm sorry if my quitting the BAU has somewhat failed you, but you failed me too. I guess we all just have to live with the disappointment." Penelope said getting into her car and slamming her door shut,

"I would appreciate it if you could keep the condition to yourselves. I would like to tell Derek myself." She added evenly as she drove out leaving them speechless.

Penelope drove to Stars Hollow seething, which she knew was not conducive to Dr Manning's orders, so she tried really hard to focus on other things. She had called Jess as an alternative when nothing seemed to work,

"Hey Kid, what are you up to this weekend? You up to hanging out?" she asked, knowing that if anything could get her out of her funk it would be Jess' dry sense of humour.

"Not much, heard you were headed to the Hollow."

"I am. You want a ride?"

"As in you'd drive to Philly to pick me up?" he asked amused,

"Yes, but you drive to Stars Hollow."

"You'd let me drive Esther?"

"You sound so shocked."

"Are you dying?" he teased.

"Shut up, do you want a ride or not?"

"Road trip with my favourite Aunt, now there's a quandary. how long till you get here?"

Penelope gave him a time frame of her arrival, factoring in many stops. She had called Luke to let him know that she wouldn't be arriving till probably late that afternoon. Derek had called her on the way to Jess',

"Hey, just checking in to see how you're traveling."

"I'm doing okay. I get tired a lot faster so I stop a lot. Aside from that it's a nice drive…Thank you,"

"For what?" he asked,

"For giving me the space I asked for, I know that you knew I didn't go to Luke's last night."

"Well, it wasn't the easiest decision I've ever made, but I'm glad it was the right one. Listen Pen, about what you said, I can see how you would see it as my subconscious not wanting to be all in, but I swear to you, I'm all in. I want this, I want us. I want our child to grow up with us together. I was an idiot for gambling the way I did, but old habits die hard, and that's all it was Pen. I swear."

"I just couldn't bear the thought of losing you."

"You're never going to lose me Baby Girl, I promise you that. I will always find a way back to you."

"You can't promise me that Derek, especially not in your line of work. No one can."

"Then will you at least take the promise of I will always try and find my way back to you." Penelope paused for a moment running her hand around her belly.

"Okay," she answered willing to take his word for it.

"Really?" he prodded, wanting the reassurance.

"Yes, fight over." Penelope confirmed and smiled as she heard him exhale.

"I love you P."

"I love you too."

"Where in the heck are you?" he asked finally,

"On my way to pick up Jess, and then he's driving us to Stars Hollow. I needed the distraction, and the boy is gifted in that area."

"Are you there yet?"

"Almost, thanks for outing me to the Goon Squad, they caught me on a bad moment and got what I thought of their behaviour, unfiltered."

"Ouch, that explains why they're hanging out here in the office looking like three kids who've been grounded. Mom and Dad laid into us after you left yesterday too."

"They did? Wow. Hang on why are you in the office, it's Saturday."

"You could say it's a form of grounding for our bad behaviour. Hotch insisted we come in to finish our reports by the end of today as we start a new case on Monday."

"You're kidding?"

"I wish I was." Derek grumbled while Penelope giggled.

"I'm glad you're amused Baby Girl,"

"Well I'd love to say you guys didn't deserve it, but …"

"I know, I know. We do." He interjected.

"Listen, you and I do need to talk later okay. There's something I have to tell you. I'm okay, so don't panic, but we need to talk."

"Okay, as long as you're okay."

"I am, I promise. I better go. I need to get going again to pick up Jess, my pit stop lasted longer than anticipated. I will call you when I get to Luke's okay."

"Ok, be safe ok. Call if you need anything."

"I will do. Later handsome." She said hanging up, happy to have settled things between them.

As he hung up the phone three expectant faces were staring at him.

"So she laid into you this morning?"

"Did she ever?" Reid muttered.

"Well, if she's willing to forgive me I'd say forgiveness is in your future. Just give her time. She'll come around."

"So one of the reasons why I wanted to hang with you is because I wanted to tell you something in person,"

"And what would that be Aunt P?" Jess asked with his eyebrows raised as he glanced at her. Penelope gave him a light whack on the arm,

"Not that you goof ball. I'm pregnant."

"You got knocked up! Has Luke killed him yet?" Jess inquired with his eyes widening in anticipation. Penelope laughed.

"Jess, I'm not sixteen."

"Yes, but he got you pregnant without a ring on your finger!" he pointed out,

"Yeah, well I think your Uncle is smart enough to know that I'm just as scared of the marriage thing as the next guy so he's nice enough to leave it to my discretion, which is what I would expect from you too young man."

"If you're happy I'm happy Aunt P. You know that," he answered with a shrug.

"Thanks Kid. Also I quit BAU, so I'm now a civilian like the rest of you."

"Which means no more acting like you're on protective custody?"

"That's right."

"Cool!"


	14. Getting there

_**Hey guys, this chapter is more of a boring filler for what's ahead. **__**I wanted to resolve the issue with the girls and Reid. I think this story is drawing to a close shortly. Hope you like it…**_

Penelope had a blast hanging out with the Danes clan, it was exactly what she needed. Rory who had taken over the Crapshack had offered her the downstairs bedroom to which she obliged to more than willingly. Rory was only going to be around over the weekend and then she and Jess were headed back to their respective destinations, leaving her with the house all to herself. On Sunday morning Penelope had called Derek to let him know that she was staying the week, she knew that they would take on a new case on the Monday anyway, which more than likely meant that he would be away.

They were all sitting in the back yard at Luke and Lorelai's when Derek pulled in. Pen grinned as she stood to meet him,

"Hey little boy, are you lost?" she asked. Derek jumped out of his SUV and gathered her in his arms.

"God I've missed you." He murmured as she ran her hand along his neck.

"Funny you should say that, because I've missed you too. Come out back and join us. Luke's doing the manly thing and barbecuing." She said taking his hand in his. As Derek greeted everyone hello, his hand remained clasped in Penelope's.

After lunch, Derek drove a tired Penelope back to the Crapshack. He lay with her on the bed as she drifted off to sleep hugging his arm that was wrapped around her. When she woke up a little while later she smiled at the sound of his soft snoring. As she giggled he stirred.

"What?" he asked.

"You were snoring,"

"What? I do not snore." He protested.

"And the Pope really isn't Catholic."

"Really?" he teased getting ready to attack,

"Please no, I take it back." She said holding her arms up in surrender.

"Hey, you know how I said we had to talk?"

"Yeah?" he replied encouraging her to go on. He listened carefully as Penelope had told him what Dr Manning had said.

"P, why didn't you tell me when you found out?"

"Because there were so many things going on, then the bombing incident, and well…"

"So are you on medication?"

"Yes and no, she prescribed them but recommended to only use it when it's absolutely necessary,"

"How are you feeling?"

"Honestly, this is as relaxed as I've been in a really long time."

"Is that why you're staying the week?"

"Yeah, I figured you'd be away with the case anyway and just head back when you're done."

"That's a good idea, at least I know you'll be in excellent hands."

Derek stayed for dinner, and after lots of prodding, he was finally on his way very reluctant to let her go.

"You be careful okay. I may not be on the other side of that phone as a techie, but I have sources."

"I know you do, and I promise you I will be careful. I have you to come back to."

"And don't you forget it Morgan." She said looking up at him. Derek placed his lips on her forehead.

"Never Baby Girl, never."

Penelope stayed at the Danes' long after Derek had left to go home. When she yawned Luke walked her home.

"So, things seem better between you guys since we spoke on the phone." Luke observed.

"Yeah, we're getting there. I could be mad at him till the cows come home but what would be the point. After we talked about it, I think he gets it and vice versa. I tell you what though, I am so glad to no longer be on the other side of that phone going through all those horrific images."

"Can I now admit to you what a relief it is that you are no longer in that profession?" Penelope chuckled,

"Says the man who wouldn't let me do it only six months ago,"

"Well, I didn't want you to do it for the wrong reasons and regret it." Luke explained.

"I know and I appreciate that you're always looking out for my best interest."

"It's what families do Bug."

Penelope was choosing from Rory's extensive collection of books to read when her phone started buzzing, recognising the ring tone immediately she contemplated on letting it go to her voicemail, sighing she gave in and picked it up.

"Reid," Reid who wasn't expecting her to answer stammered, the fact that she addressed him by his name was enough to say that she was still peeved.

"Hey Garcia,"

"What's up Reid?" she asked as she sank down on the couch and turned the TV on.

"I just wanted to check in and say hi. Make sure you got to where you were going safely."

"I did thank you." She answered not providing any more detail than necessary. She knew that she could cut the kid some slack as his abandonment issues would have flared at her announcement, but she was still disappointed in him, in all of them.

"I hate this. I hate that you're mad at me, and I'm sorry."

"It's not a picnic for me either Reid." Garcia pointed out dryly.

"I know, and that's our fault. My fault, I know better, and I guess it was just overwhelming to have it happen so quickly. I know I hurt you and you may never know how sorry I truly am for that because it was the last thing I would ever want to do. You're my best friend Pen, and I acted like a jerk, you're only right to hate me."

"I don't hate you. Disappointed, hurt and peeved yes, hate no."

"I miss you." He admitted sounding like her Reid,

"It's not the same without you. We were in the office yesterday and out of habit I walked into your bunker and it was filled with Kevin's crap and it made me even sadder knowing that we made it so hard for you on your last couple of days."

"Well you guys surely weren't in a very loving mood, but I miss you too Kid. Did you honestly think that I would walk away from your life?"

"I don't know."

"Boy Genius, as mad as I was and still am at you and those two bird brain ladies I call my friends, I could never just walk away from you. I can definitely stop talking to you till I am calm enough to address you, but I will always be there for you. It hurts that you doubt that. That any of you could doubt that."

"I screwed up, I'm sorry."

"I know you are. I appreciate the apology. You're just going to have to let me ride it out okay?"

"Can I still call you?" he asked timidly,

"Of course you can Sweet Cheeks. Any time of day, I'm there for you."

"Thanks Garcia."

Penelope was in the middle of an old rerun of the Cosby Show when Derek had called to let her know that he had arrived safely.

"Reid called me earlier."

"Yeah, he's not coping with you mad at him."

"I got that, he's not completely off the hook but he knows I love him."

"The girls?"

"Waiting for me to simmer, they know me well enough to know that I am not going to take anything they have to say right now. Reid I can understand, but those two know better."

"They projected their sadness wrong."

"That's an understatement. So do you guys know where you're off to tomorrow?"

"Not yet, Hotch and Gideon aren't in the most talkative of moods, especially to us."

"Still grounded? Do you want me to get them to let you guys off the hook?" she teased.

"No, they're justified and right. We need to deal with the consequences of our actions."

While the Team were busy on a case in Seattle, Penelope kept herself well entertained in Stars Hollow. With all of its quirky residents, it was hard not to be entertained. Derek called frequently as expected. Reid checked in daily and the girls had been sending her text messages throughout each and every day that passed. Though they had not yet spoken, the ice was beginning to thaw.

"Are you okay?" Penelope asked as Emily answered her phone. Emily smiled,

"So all I needed was to almost get killed for you to forgive me?"

"Who said anything about forgiveness? I just wanted to make sure you were alive." Penelope replied rolling her eyes.

"I'm fine. A few bruises, but I'm tough. I can take it."

"You don't fool me Emily Prentiss."

"Yeah well, I never could. I'll be okay though. Pen,"

"Yeah?"

"I've missed talking to you."

"Me too,"

"We really are sorry."

"I know. Are you guys headed back today?"

"Tomorrow morning,"

"How panicked is Aaron?"

"Ready to crack." She answered honestly. Being held hostage and being beaten while your boss also your boyfriend heard everything that happened to you took it's toll on all involved.

"Is Reid okay?"

"You might want to check on that, I'm not getting through." Emily answered vaguely, knowing that Reid was blaming himself that she took all the beating from Cyrus.

"I will do."

"Thanks for calling Pen."

"It's what friends do. Now go back to being checked." Emily smiled and handed the phone to Morgan,

"Hey Baby, we're finishing up. Call you when we get to the hotel."

"Sure hon. Thank you,"

"For what Baby?" he asked.

"For keeping your promise,"

"Always! Love you!"

"Love you too."

When the team arrived the next morning, there waited Penelope in the bull pen waiting. Hotch, Gideon, Derek, Reid, Emily and JJ beamed at the sight of her. Emily grinned and made a bee line towards her friend and threw her arms around her.

"I'm so glad you're here." She whispered.

"Yeah well I wanted to make sure you were in one piece." Penelope replied glad to see that her friend was okay.

"It's good to see you Pen." Hotch said with a smile.

"How's Stars Hollow?" Gideon asked.

"Peaceful, crazy, wonderful! It's good to be home for long periods of time."

As she released Emily she pulled Reid into a hug. The young man sank into her comforting arms and choked back his emotions. Garcia had a way of making him feel his emotions, and her mere touch almost had him in tears.

"Hey Kid, you okay?" Reid nodded knowing he wasn't fooling her. JJ stood behind Reid awaiting her turn.

"I'm sorry Pen." JJ apologised hugging her friend.

"I know."

Hotch and Gideon ushered them all out of the bullpen and they all went out to breakfast together. It was nice to be with all of them again, laughing and just enjoying each other's company.

"Thank you." Gideon said quietly as they looked through the menu side by side,

"What for?" Penelope asked confused

"For coming, for knowing that they needed you. For bringing everyone together."

"We're still a family right?" she answered with a grin. Gideon smiled and patted her hand before turning looking up at the waitress to give her his order. Derek leaned over and placed a kiss on her temple as his arm rested on the back of her chair.

"Hotch, you mind if I take Em home and get her settled in?" Pen asked looking at Emily who just nodded and smiled at her friend's intuitiveness.

"Of course," the rest of them were heading back to the office with the exception of Emily who was pretty bruised up.

Upon saying their goodbyes Hotch had pulled her aside,

"Thank you. I know she would be more comfortable with you helping her than me. You know she'd never let me help her."

"She will in time, meanwhile you have me."

"And I am grateful."

Penelope took a slow moving Emily to her apartment and drawn a bath for her as she helped remove the bandages so she could take a long hot bath. As she Emily soaked in her tub, Penelope had changed the sheets on Emily's bed. It was handy to know where everything was.

"Honey, did you need a hand washing your hair?" Pen said knocking on the bathroom door.

"Yes please." Emily called back. For the next ten minutes Penelope helped Emily wash her hair, and tried to make it as painless as possible knowing that Emily could barely move. She had gasped when she first saw how bruised her friend was. She was black and blue all over and tears began to well from her eyes at the sight of her.

"It's okay Pen, it looks worse than it is. I promise." Emily said trying to reassure her. After washing her hair Penelope tenderly washed Emily's bruised back.

"I can't let Aaron see me this way. It'll break him." Emily mumbled softly.

Penelope wasn't quite sure how she would be able to hide it, but knew it wasn't impossible provided Emily wasn't opposed to being fully clothed at all times.

"You know, it's just us. You can not be Super Emily if you need to." Pen said softly as she helped Emily rinse off the sudds from her body. After Emily was in her pyjamas and safely tucked into her bed, the tears began. Penelope sat on the edge of the bed as Emily buried her face into Pen's lap and sobbed as Penelope rubbed her back soothingly. Pen stayed with Emily till she reached deep sleep before searching the kitchen to make something for Em to eat when she woke. As her head was buried in Emily's sparse freezer her phone began to vibrate in her pocket,

"Hey Hotch,"

"She okay?" he asked worriedly.

"She will be. The physical bruises will heal in time,"

"And the psychological?"

"The nightmares will come, but she knows she's well loved, and that will be enough in time."

"Thank you for being there."

"Aaron,"

"Yeah Pen?"

"There was nothing you could have done. She knew the dangers of what she was getting herself into. You didn't put her in that situation. I know it would have killed you to hear everything as they were happening, but this isn't any more your fault than Reid's. There was nothing you could have done." She repeated trying to get through to him.

"My mind knows that, my heart is having trouble catching up."

"And that's okay, but she needs you and you can't be there for her if you're stuck on this."

"I will keep that in mind. Is she sleeping?"

"Yeah, just raiding her fridge and cupboards for anything that's cooking worthy of a meal," Hotch started laughing knowing that if she were to find anything it would be a miracle.

"I appreciate the support."

"Would you like me to do a quick run to the grocery?"

"No no, I'll find something. You of little faith,"

"Well call if you need anything."

"I will, thanks Hotch."

Emily awoke to the smell of brownies wafting through her bedroom. She grinned and slowly made her way to the kitchen to find Penelope taking out the brownie tray from the oven.

"That is the best smell in the world, it's been awhile since my kitchen has had anything be cooked in here."

"I noticed. The only thing in your pantry cooking worthy was the box of brownies, so I thought I'd bake that to tide you over till the pizza came."

"Aww, you take such good care of me." Emily said giving her friend a quick hug.

"Yeah yeah."

Penelope and Emily sat in front of the TV watching Dirty Dancing, with the brownies still in its pan between them.

"Thanks for taking care of me Pen."

"Sure thing hon."

"And again, I'm so sorry for being a jack ass last week."

"Yeah well, to some extent I understood it. You still suck for doing it, but I understood the defence mechanism behind it."

"It's so strange being in the office without you."

"It's strange not being in the office, half the time I think I'm on vacation. But I have to be honest with you and say that I'm happy with the decision I made. I have been nightmare and anxiety free since I resigned. I mean I always worry about you guys when you're on a case, but there's a beauty in out of sight, out of mind."

"Well I haven't seen you this relaxed ever… Pen, are you thinking of moving to Stars Hollow?" Emily asked.

"What? Why would you ask me that?"

"Earlier today you referred to it as home."

"I guess that's what I get for doing a Freudian slip in the company of profilers. Honestly, I thought about it, but Derek's here, and you guys are here, and I want Bambino here to be a part of all your lives, and if I lived in the Hollow, that will be a little harder to do. I did however think of fixing up the house that my parents had in Stars Hollow. They had bought it just before they died. We lived in Hartford when I was growing up, when I left for college they wanted to be nearer to Uncle Will, I guess they must have known he was sick, and they died before they could move in. I've never been brave enough to move in it, but I think it might be nice to have a place to go to on weekends, maybe even for the summer when he or she grows up."

"That sounds nice. Have you been to the house recently?" Emily asked.

"Yeah, Luke and I checked it out. Surprisingly it is in good condition. I suspect that has a lot to do with one Luke Danes who refused to admit to it. There's not really much to do except maybe paint it. Most of the furniture in there Luke and Uncle Will had taken from our home. I couldn't deal with it at the time so they dealt with it, so I thought they just sold everything like I told them to and they didn't. They kept my Dad's favourite leather chair that I used to sit on with him and he used to read to me in it. I remember how safe I used to feel in that chair, and funny enough, so many years later, it still brings me great comfort."

"Aww hon, I can't wait to see it."

"I was thinking of heading down this weekend and starting. I seriously doubt Luke will let me do anything extensive, but I'm really excited at the idea."

"That sounds great Pen."

Penelope stayed with Emily that night at her request, she held her friend as she awoke from her nightmare, scared and shaking. She could only offer her soothing words of comfort. Hotch had given Emily the rest of the week off, much to her dismay but Penelope had kept her well entertained with paint samples and baby shopping, which she enjoyed immensely.

"Hey Baby, how much damage did you and Em manage to make at Baby Gap?" Derek asked as he walked through the door of her apartment to find Pen and Em sprawled around in her living room surrounded by Baby things.

"Don't look at me, I was well behaved, Aunty Emily here on the other hand just wanted to buy every thing in sight."

"Hey, he or she is my first niece or nephew, and it is within my Aunt duties to spoil my niece or nephew."

"Well I can't argue there." Derek said bending down to kiss Penelope hello.

"How are you feeling Em?" he asked tousling her hair as he passed her.

"Better thanks. How far away is the Boss man from coming?" Emily asked after Hotch who was picking her up.

"Half an hour, he went to pick up dinner, and everyone else should be here soon."

"There's a party?" Em asked amused.

"With our crowd, always!" Penelope answered rising from her seat to get a drink from the fridge and returned with a bottle of water for her and Emily and handed Morgan a beer.

"Thanks Baby." Penelope sat on the arm of his chair with Derek's arms wrapped comfortably around her middle.

A few minutes later the rest of the gang arrived with food on hand and the rest of the evening was spent engaged in a healthy competition of Pictionary that had them all in hysterics for most of the evening.


	15. A happy ending, just around the corner

_**Just a short chapter, I am having problems on tying it up… hence my lil angst pieces… Savin' Grace, I am working on that HAPPY ENDING for you I promise =) **_

That weekend Penelope had planned to go to Stars Hollow to get started on setting up the house. Emily who was still under her strict supervision was accompanying her. Hotch's constant hovering was starting to grate her and she seeing as she wasn't allowed to come back to work, she had jumped at the offer to hang with Pen in Stars Hollow.

"So how are things between you and Derek?" Emily asked as they drove to Stars Hollow.

"Better, I know that I can't ask him to be less than who he is by changing how he does his work, but I needed him to realize that it's not just him anymore, and that if I lost him, I would be lost. I think I took the Women's movement back a few decades." Penelope said with a small smile.

"Oh hon, you needed to tell him how you were feeling. It was only right. He's been single for so long with no one to be accountable to. It was only fair, you've both been living your own life for so long that when you got together, you needed to re-evaluate that."

"How's that working with you and Hotch?"

"Better than I thought it would. I suppose with Jack to factor in we're forced to deal with things like that. Don't get me wrong, he's on my last nerve right now. I swear, I am not the wilting flower he thinks I am."

"Maybe he needs you to be a wilting flower in front of him so that he can gauge that you aren't?" When Emily looked at Penelope as though she was nuts, Pen laughed

"You're bound and determined not to break down, and I almost have to threaten you before you allow yourself to break down, maybe if you broke down in front of Hotch he knows you're dealing with it and you trust him with it so he doesn't have to constantly try and over compensate because he's not quite sure if he's being that support for you."

"Wow, ever consider being a profiler Pen?" Emily teased.

"Not with the hours you people do!" Pen chuckled.

Pen and Emily arrived at Stars Hollow in time for lunch. Pen called ahead to let him know that they were nearby and he had prepared their food so that when they came through the door, it was ready.

"Wow, you really do get good service around here." Emily observed throwing April a wink as she placed the plates in front of them. April giggled and walked into Pen's arms for a hug hello.

"Hey Aunt Pen, looks like my little cousin is growing, I so can't wait till he's out."

"He?" Luke asked catching the tail end,

"No confirmations as yet Uncle Luke and Cousin April," Penelope answered wryly as she turned to give Luke a hug.

"Hey Bean, I was hoping to take Em to the house."

"Sure, why don't you settle in upstairs after lunch and I'll take you guys down there. I've got my room ready for you Pen, and Em, April's old room is ready for you too."

"Thanks Bean,"

April was filling them in all about school as they walked to the house. Emily could understand why Penelope felt so at home at Stars Hollow, it was quiet, safe and filled with people she loved. Luke held so much of her childhood, and her past and when things go wrong you tend to be drawn to those who anchor who you are, and Luke obviously does that for her.

Emily gasped as she saw the house that could almost be described a cottage. It wasn't big, but it certainly wasn't small, the white picket fence and rose garden at the front made it all the more cosy,

"Pen, it's beautiful. It's like a fairy tale." Penelope grinned at her friend's obvious approval,

"Wait till you see inside." Luke replied. Penelope glanced up at him suspiciously as they entered the house.

"Oh Luke, what have you done? It's beautiful." Penelope said as tears ran down her cheeks. She took in the whole room, beautifully painted and furnished with the furniture from her childhood. Photos filled one of the walls, photos of her parents, of her, Luke and his family, and her BAU family.

"Don't look at me, I just helped. Elves called me a couple of days ago and they have been busy ever since."

"What?" Pen asked confused. Just as she did Hotch, Reid, JJ, Gideon and Morgan popped out of the bedroom.

"Oh my gosh! You guys!"

"We just wanted to do this for you. You do so much for us, and after how horrible we were to you last week, you know we're sorry, and if in some small way this shows you how much we love you and how much you mean to us, well we just wanted to make sure you knew." Reid babbled.

"Thanks Sweet Cheeks, I really appreciate that. Thank you everyone." Penelope said as gratefully.

"Would you like to see the rest of the house?" Derek asked grinning excitedly.

"Yes please!" Penelope's was jumping up and down excitedly as they went from room to room, when they stood in front of what was to be the baby's room Luke spoke,

"This was Derek's special project. Every thing you see in this room, was his doing."

"Well, with the exception of one thing. I hope you like it Baby Girl," Penelope gasped as she took in what was to be their baby's room. Derek had pained it a shade of purple that was surprisingly gender neutral, and it was beautifully furnished. He had a mural on one wall, and black and white photos framed on another. It was fully equipped with clothes, nappies, monitors, bouncers, toys, etc.

"Baby it's amazing. I love it. I love that you designed the mural and your artwork is every where." She said recognizing the black and white photos he had taken. Candid photos of her and the girls, their team, his family, Luke and Lorelai's wedding.

"I love that when our baby is in here he or she is surrounded by people who love him or her."

"There's one more thing,"

"What Baby?" she inquired curiously turning to look at him in time to see him get down on one knee,

"Penelope Margaret Garcia, will you marry me?" Penelope's eye balls almost popped out of her eyes.

"Yes, oh my Gosh yes!" she replied definitively but in obvious shock. Morgan slipped the ring on her finger before pulling her into a hug. Emily and JJ squealed with excitement as though they had not known the plan all along. Morgan released his bride to be so that the rest of their family can express their warmest wishes. The Men stood back amused as Penelope, JJ and Emily wrapped their arms around each other and started jumping up and down like a bundh of teenagers.

"Hey Luke, did you want to reveal your surprise?" Derek asked when they settled down a few minutes later.

"Are you sure?" he asked as Derek nodded. Penelope watched as Reid, Gideon and Hotch stood aside to reveal his surprise. Shocked Penelope looked at Luke and started crying. She walked over to the rocking chair,

"You fixed it?" Luke nodded,

"I knew that Derek was going all out on the nursery, but I asked him to let me do this."

"When I was little we used to have this rocking chair. It's been around for as long as I can remember. My Mom used to rock me in it when I was baby, and even as I got bigger, I used to sit on her lap and she used to read to me. When I was sick my Dad used to rock me to sleep in it. Anyways, when they died I just couldn't look at it. After all this time I thought Uncle Will and Luke may have sold it but I should have known better. Thanks Bean." She explained giving Luke a hug.


	16. on the morning of our wedding day

Penelope loved everything they had done to the cottage that was once her parents, and it meant a lot to her that the people she loved most in the world had worked so hard to make it what it was. More often than not, when Morgan and the team were away on a case, Penelope spent her time in Stars Hollow, which gave all those involved a peace of mind, as she was always surrounded by people who were looking out for her. The drive to Stars Hollow took longer than usual as her breaks became more frequent, but it was far from stressful. She enjoyed the drive.

After much convincing, Penelope agreed to marry Derek before Baby Morgan entered the world, to the joy of Fran Morgan who was busily working with Penelope, Emily, JJ, Sarah and Desiree to plan the wedding. Luke and Jess were walking her down the aisle. Lorelai was her Matron of Honour, while Emily and JJ were her Bridesmaids. Sarah was standing as Derek's best man, while Hotch and Reid were Groomsmen. Fran and Desiree were walking with Derek down the aisle. Gideon, Rory and April were reading for the mass. Everything was quickly falling into place and as the day neared the more excited Penelope became.

Derek, who couldn't quite believe that she finally agreed to marry went from excited, disbelief and worried all in a span of minutes. Hotch watched him all giddy and jumpy for what was ahead and was genuinely happy for him, as they all were.

Emily and JJ have talked nothing but motif and wedding details for months and they were beginning to drive the boys insane, which amused Penelope to no end.

On the morning of the wedding Penelope awoke to Emily and JJ knocking on her door. They had slept over the night before as one last slumber party, fully equipped with romantic movies and ice cream. They had Bridal Shower for her the previous week with pretty much the same theme, as being 6 months pregnant there was very little she could really do. Lorelai, Sookie, Rory, Fran, Sarah, Desiree and April had joined them which made the night even more interesting especially as all the significant women in her life began to trade stories and secrets.

"Good morning lovely, breakfast in bed courtesy of your Prince." Emily said bringing a tray in loaded with blueberry pancakes, bacon, eggs and fruit salad, freshly squeezed orange juice and water, a single red rose sat in a small vase sat on the tray with breakfast.

"You let him in?" she asked surprised.

"Only to cook the breakfast and once he was done, we kicked him out. He sends the rose, and his love. He said to tell you that he loves you and can't wait to marry you!" JJ answered.

"Aww, that's so sweet."

"It's hard to believe he's Derek Morgan." Emily teased, while Penelope rolled her eyes in response.

"I'm getting married today." Penelope said grinning at her best friends. Emily and JJ looked at each other and tackled their friend with a hug. Penelope laughed thankful that Emily had put the tray of food down before they tackled her.

"Thank you both for working as hard as you do to make sure my day is going to be amazing."

"What are friends for? Besides, we know you'd do exactly the same for us."

"You bet ya!"

"Derek, baby calm down," Fran said amused as she watched her son unconsciously pace around his apartment, looking at the clock every five minutes. Derek looked at his mother sheepishly,

"I'm just excited. I can't believe this day is here. I can't believe she's finally agreed to marry me."

"She loves you."

"And, I love her. More than I ever thought it was possible to love anyone outside you, Sarah and Desiree."

"It means you're lucky, and so is she. You have a great future ahead of you, and I can't wait to see it all unfold. I am so excited for you, and for me. I finally get a grandchild!" Fran beamed. Derek sat beside his mother and dropped a kiss on her cheek,

"I love you Mom."

"I love you too Baby."

"Please, can I please just call him to thank him for breakfast?" Penelope begged her friends as they held her cell phone hostage. Before they could reply it began to ring a familiar ring tone. Emily rolled her eyes and handed the phone to Garcia.

"Hey Baby!" she greeted.

"Hey Princess, what no warden? I was sure to meet resistance from your end.

"Well, I was in the middle of whining to call you. You just have good timing. I had finally wore them down. Thank you for breakfast my love."

"It was a pleasure. I was hoping to sneak into your room, but Bert and Ernie were guarding your door." Penelope cracked up at the reference.

"They mean well. It won't be long Mr Morgan and we have a date at St Joseph's."

"Counting down the minutes,"

"Oh hey, I think time's up. Your Mom's just walked in,"

"Amazing, she must've run all the way to yours because I could have sworn she was here five minutes ago."

"If it makes you feel better, I think it's more the grandchild than the baby vessel." She quipped.

"I heard that Penelope." Fran admonished with a twinkle in her eye.

"Busted. Gotta go. Bye baby! Love you."

"Love you too." Penelope heard before hanging up and placing her phone on Emily's outstretched hand.

"Hey Fran," Penelope greeted stepping into the older woman's embrace.

"I see my son didn't waste any time in diving for the phone the moment he closed the door behind me.

"We don't do well with separation." Pen answered smiling.

Fran didn't stay long, she merely wanted to check on Penelope and make sure there was nothing she could do for her. She knew that as well loved as Penelope was, she would be missing her parents, and she wanted to make her presence known, so that Penelope knew that she was there for her too.

"Thank you Fran, for welcoming me into your family so unconditionally."

"You're very easy to love Penelope, and I could not be happier to have you as a daughter."

Luke had arrived just as Fran was leaving. Penelope quietly walked up to him and threw her arms around his neck and buried her face on his flannel shirt. Instinctively he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. Emily and JJ had gone to the guest room to get started.

"Hey, you can do this. They're with you, always. In your heart, and in spirit, they're happy Bug. Overjoyed that you have found a man worthy of your love, who loves you every bit as much as you love him, if not more."

"I miss them Bean. I really miss them."

"I know you do Ladybug, and that's okay. It's only natural to remember them today, and miss them like crazy, but you're not alone. They're surrounded you with people who love you almost as much as they do to get you through this day. We're all standing with you."

"I'm glad you're giving me away Bean,"

"And I am honoured." Luke pulled out something from his pocket and held out his hand,

"Your something old." Penelope gasped at his mother's favourite diamond earrings. Growing up she had admired them, and now he was giving it to her.

"She wanted you to have them. She asked me to keep it for you for your wedding day."

"Are you sure?"

"Of course," Penelope carefully took the earrings from him and put them on.

"How does it look?" she asked tearfully.

"Perfect P, fits like a glove."

By noon Penelope's apartment had been invaded by women, much to Luke and Jess' dismay. Not long after everyone in the wedding party arrived, Luke, Jess and Jackson had snuck out to the nearest pub to kill time.

As Hotch, Gideon, and Reid hung out with Morgan to keep him company before he burst the Morgan women took a trip to Penelope's to check out the progress.

"Pen, we have something for you." Sarah said as they walked into her room where JJ and Emily were assisting with her hair. Desiree opened the box in her hand that held a beautiful butterfly barrette,

"It's a Morgan family heirloom. It's been passed down to generations of Morgan women who wore it to their wedding. Mom wore it to her wedding, and Sarah wore it to hers, and I will wear it to mine. We would love it if you wore it, as your something borrowed."

"It's beautiful. I would be honoured." The Morgan women smiled. Fran took the barrette from Desiree and carefully placed them in Penelope's hair.

"Perfect!" she said looking at Penelope through her reflection on the mirror, hands resting affectionately on her shoulders. Penelope covered her future mother in law's hands with hers and smiled gratefully.

When it was only JJ and Emily that remained in the room, Emily had signalled for JJ to take out their present for Penelope.

"Pen, we got you something from the two of us."

"You guys didn't have to do that." She protested.

"Hush you and just open." Emily said handed her the box. Penelope's eyes brimmed with tears again as she held out the thin white gold neck lace with heart shaped pendant. Emily held it up to the light to show her that there was a tinge of blue that glistened,

"Your something blue."

"That's awesome. Thank you!" she said throwing her arms around her best friends.

"Let's try doing my make up once again shall we?" Pen said chuckling.


	17. I do

"You ready?" Luke asked patting her hand as they stood behind the closed door of St Joseph's. Penelope looked up at him and grinned.

"You betcha! Let's do this."

Luke signalled for Jackson to open the door, an evident gasped filled the room as all eyes fell on Penelope in her Ivory wedding gown. Seemingly out of character, it was simple and elegantly cut. It gathered perfectly somewhat concealing her bump regardless just how pregnant she was. As she looked up at Derek, she saw the tears in his eyes and felt her own eyes well up. She was beautiful, her hair was gathered loosely, and it framed her face. As she got closer he recognised the barrette that held her hair in place and quickly glanced at his mother who merely smiled. He had not known what they had done. As she walked towards him it was like time was moving so slowly and she wasn't getting there fast enough, he couldn't wait to take her in his arms. When they finally reached the altar, and Luke was to hand her over Luke's eyes met his, Derek nodded in understanding, in promise that he would take care of her. Luke kissed her temple and carefully handed her to a beaming Derek.

Penelope couldn't was completely enthralled by the whole ceremony. It meant so much to her that the people she loved most in the world were a part of her special day. As Gideon proceeded with the First Reading, she couldn't help but tear up. As he read about Love, and what is ahead for them, it seemed to mean more coming from him. As though he was speaking it over their life. Morgan who held her hand tightly in his, gave it a quick squeeze before bringing it to his lips. Penelope glanced at him and leaned a little closer to him, happy and content.

JJ and Emily exchanged a smile as they watched their friends exchange their vows, to them no two people deserve to be as happy as Penelope and Morgan, after everything they had been through, there was no other ending acceptable.

"You may now kiss your bride." Father Thomas said to Derek who didn't waste any time to gather his bride in his arms and kiss her. Penelope blushed as she heard the hooting from the crowd.

Hand in hand Mr and Mrs Morgan practically skipped out of the church, and were immediately surrounded by their family and close friends wanting to offer their congratulations. The boys laughed as they saw JJ, Emily and Penelope squeal while jumping up and down in each other's arms. Hotch, Reid and Morgan looked at each other and at the same time let out the girliest squeal they could muster and threw their arms around each other and started jumping up and down. The girls looked at the boys and rolled their eyes while Luke stood with Gideon chuckling in deep amusement.

The rest of their afternoon was spent taking photos with family and the Bridal Party. By the time they made it to the hotel for the reception Derek was complaining that they had not had any time on their own since they said I do.

"That's not true baby, we were in the car by ourselves." Penelope said trying to reason with husband. Derek growled, nipping her neck

"You know what I mean."

"Baby, we're almost done. Your Mom just wants photos on the staircase and then we can chill out in our room till the reception starts. For at least a half hour okay?" She said trying to appease him. She kissed him before pushing him away, acutely aware that they were standing in the hotel lobby waiting for the camera man to finish setting up, grumbling Derek stood there with his arms folded in impatience. Penelope was equally impatient to have the formalities wrapped up, she could feel herself getting tired rapidly. Sensing this Fran walked up to the couple,

"Pen, we don't have to do this. If you're tired, you can go on up to your room till the reception starts." Immediately the petulant child in Derek, was overtaken by the concerned Husband,

"You okay Baby?" he asked. Penelope smiled, there was the man she loved and adored.

"I'm fine. It's okay Fran. Just a couple more and then I will take that offer."

"You sure?" her mother in law asked worriedly.

"Of course." Penelope reassured Fran. When Fran went to hurry up the cameraman, Derek pulled his wife closer. His arms wrapped securely around her middle.

"Sorry," he apologised sheepishly.

"It's okay." Penelope leaned back to kiss his cheek.

When they were finally released to their room, Derek led his wife to the bed and took her shoes off.

"Baby, why don't you lay down for a bit. Get your second wind." Too tired to argue Penelope nodded pulling him with her on the bed. Derek enveloped her in his arms as she curled up against him. Derek ran his hand along her stomach soothingly as though sensing that their little peanut was getting restless.

"Funny, Peanut doesn't calm down as quickly when I'm the one rubbing my stomach, but the moment Daddy lays a hand on my stomach Peanut calms down. I'm not sure if I am comforted by your alliance." Derek laughed, kissing her shoulder.

It wasn't long after that Penelope fell asleep in his arms. He looked at the time and was thankful that they had about an hour before they had to come down to the reception. Unbeknown to both of them the girls had planned such a long interval between the ceremony and reception knowing that Penelope was going to need a rest period. An hour later, the girls knocked softly on the door. Derek, who had fallen asleep himself woke up startled by their knocking.

"Sorry, we tried to let you guys sleep as long as possible, but the ceremony starts in about 15 minutes so we thought we'd help Pen get ready." Emily said apologetically as Morgan opened the door.

"Thanks, come on in and I'll wake her." He said ushering them in before walking over to Penelope's side of the bed.

"Hey Baby, wake up. It's time to go downstairs. The girls are here and they're going to help you get ready." Morgan said rubbing her cheeks with the back of his hand coaxing her out of her slumber.

"Hmm, okay." Penelope replied hesitantly opening her eyes. Derek held his hand out to help her up, she waved at JJ and Emily sleepily before making her way to the bathroom to wash her face. Derek followed Penelope in the bathroom to get himself ready.

It didn't take long for Penelope to redo her make up with the assistance of the girls. She had slept in her wedding dress, but luckily it didn't show. They made it in time for the Emcee to announce their arrival. Despite how tired Penelope was, she enjoyed the night immensely.

Gideon had stepped in to partake in the Father Daughter dance with her, surprised when he had stood up instead of Luke she took his hand and glanced back at Luke who nodded his blessing. Gideon had asked him if he would mind, and he didn't. Though he gave her away, it was Gideon who played that Father figure in her life, and halfway through the song, Gideon had signalled to Teddi who walked up with tears in his eyes. Gideon dropped his lips to her forehead before handing her to Teddi.

"Bug…" he began,

"Thank you." She whispered burying her head to his chest. For what he stood for and who he was standing in for.

The mood was lifted not long after by a rendition of 'Girls just wanna have fun' by Emily, JJ, Lorelai, Rory and Sookie. Penelope was still laughing when she saw Derek get up and take the mic from her girlfriends,

"P, you know I love you with all my heart. You and I never got to pick a song to dance to, but the moment I remembered this song, I knew it was perfect. So P, this is for you…" the band began to play the intro and Penelope recognised the song immediately as he sang the first line,

"I never knew such a day could come

And I never knew such a love

Could be inside of one

And I never knew what my life was for

But now that you're here I know for sure

I never knew till I looked in your eyes

I was incomplete till the day you walked into my life

And I never knew that my heart could feel

So precious and pure

One love so real"

Derek walked over to his bride and held his hand to her. Penelope took his hand and followed him on to the dance floor, wrapping her arms around his neck as he held her close and continued to sing,

"Can I just see you every morning when I open my eyes

Can I just feel your heart beating beside me? Every night

Can we just feel this way together? Till the end of all time

Can I just spend my life with you?

Now baby the days and the weeks and the years will roll by

But nothing will change the love inside, of you and I

And baby I'll never find any words, that could explain.

Just how much my heart my life. My soul you've changed"

By the end of the song, there was not a dry eye in the place. Emily, JJ, Lorelai, Sookie and Rory were weeping silently in the corner, along with Fran, Sarah and Des.


	18. It's a

Due to Penelope's condition, and limited mobility they opted to postpone their honeymoon for when Baby Morgan was born. Gramma Fran had already called dibs on staying with Baby Morgan for the occasion, in truth she was pushing them to go. Penelope and Morgan were staying at the hotel for a few days before driving to Teddi's beach house which he had offered to them. They accepted gratefully. Penelope and Luke knew the beach house well. They had spent many summers there with their families.

When the most of the guests had gone, leaving only the Danes, Morgans, and their BAU family behind they had sat around the Bridal table talking and processing the day they just had. Derek and Penelope had opted to stay with the family instead of sneaking away earlier. Their nap had done wonders for them both and their second wind kicked in late in the evening.

"Thank you everyone for such an amazing day. Everything was beautiful. Speaking of which, while you're all here, Derek and I wanted to get you guys something as a token of our love and appreciation," Derek signalled for the waiter to bring over the box full of presents they had carefully picked out and wrapped for their family.

"Aww Pen, you didn't need to get us anything." Emily said, while the rest of them chorused in agreement.

"It's nothing big, little tokens. You can open them later." Pen said brushing off their protests. Not long after Penelope had let out a discreet yawn that only Derek had caught.

"What do you say we call it a night Baby Girl?" Penelope nodded with a smile and took his had as they stood up.

"Peanut Morgan here seems tired and demanding rest so I think we'll head on up. Thank you again everyone, for everything you did, and for who you are to both of us. Words will never be able to express how much each of you mean to both of us."

Jess stepped in to hug his Aunt goodbye, he was driving back to Philly that night, therefore would not see her again for a little while.

"He better take good care of you Aunt P." he whispered in her ear, not entirely kidding. He had grown to like Morgan, and believed that he loved Penelope whole heartedly but he still felt protective.

"He will Kiddo."

"I promise." Derek assured him hearing Jess' words, who simply nodded and shook his hand after Penelope released him.

It was a quick goodbye to everyone else as the Danes' were staying at Penelope's while the Morgan's were staying at Derek's therefore there was a brunch with all of them the following morning.

Derek and Penelope had enjoyed their Wedding festivities and Honeymoon immensely. For two solid weeks they were not apart for more than an hour or so, and they savoured every minute of it knowing that Derek was due to return to work.

"I so don't want to go back to work tomorrow." Morgan admitted.

"That's because you've been spoiled for the last two weeks. Not having to think of anything for the last two weeks."

"Anything but my beautiful wife and child," He said rubbing her stomach as they lay spooned on their bed. They had opted to move to Penelope's place as it had more room, and they could convert the spare room into a study. Morgan had planned to give her a house for the wedding, but decided to wait till the baby was born. He had several properties, and there was one in particular that was his favourite. It was vacant, and he wanted to work on it on his own, and he wanted her input. He wanted it to be theirs in every essence.

"Not long to go." Penelope murmured excited that her due date was approaching fast.

"I can't wait. Peanut's going to be beautiful just like Mommy."

"Sweet Talker," Pen chuckled covering his hands with hers as she drifted off to sleep.

Weeks passed quickly and Pen was almost due to give birth, she and Derek were living in their marital bliss honeymoon period. As the days neared to Baby Morgan's arrival, Derek had asked Hotch if he could stick close to home in case Penelope gave birth unexpectedly early, unbeknownst to him that Hotch had already planned to ground him till after Baby Mo, as they fondly referred to the baby, arrived.

"Have you popped yet?" Jess asked teasingly as he picked up his phone seeing who it was on the other line.

"Such a charming boy you are, and no your cousin is bound and determined to being stubborn and staying where he or she feels comfortable, and no amount of jiggling is helping with loosening it up in there."

"Whoa Aunt P, way too much info."

"That's what you get for being a smart ass." Penelope chuckled dryly. Penelope was a week late and though she was perfectly calm about it, everyone around her was less so. As it was there was an unspoken rule of Penelope was not to be left alone under any circumstance. For weeks they have been working on a buddy system, and the organisation amused Penelope to no end.

"Seriously, how are you?" he asked worriedly.

"I'm good Kid, I just thought I'd give you a call to let you know that I really like the new book hey."

"Aunt P, it's not a book yet, it's a draft."

"Po-tay-to, Po-tah-to." Jess laughed at her enthusiasm. He was telling her about his meeting with his publisher when she grew awfully quiet.

"Aunt P, you okay?"

"Err, kid I have to go. It seems your news has somehow excited your cousin and is now demanding to come out."

"What? Is someone with you? What can I do?"

"Derek's somewhere in this flat, I'll be okay. You coming down to meet your cousin?" she asked making her towards the living room where Derek was watching TV.

"On my way now," Jess answered picking up his jacket to go,

"Alright, don't rush. I'm sure it'll be awhile." Derek looked up hearing her last words. Penelope nodded confirming his hunch. Derek stood to his feet and pulled his phone out as he threw her bag over his shoulder and started to lead her out the door.

"See you soon Aunt P."

"That you will Kiddo. I gotta go and call the girls."

Derek was on the phone to Hotch, who he asked to spread the word to the others.

"Aunty JJ, are you ready to meet Baby Mo?" Penelope laughed and pulled the phone away from her ear as JJ squealed. Emily's reaction was much the same when she called her right after. Both Aunties vowed to meet them at the hospital. While Derek drove, as carefully as he could, but as fast as he possibly could Penelope made more calls in between her contractions.

"Uncle Luke, fancy meeting your niece or nephew, because the kid's finally ready to make it's appearing."

"Lorelai and I are leaving now." Luke said

"Baby, do you want to call your Mom?" Penelope asked, knowing how excited Fran would be.

"You can do it, put her on speaker."

"Hey Mom," they greeted in unison.

"You're in labour?" Fran stated not waiting for the announcement. Penelope and Derek laughed.

"I sure am Mom, you ready to come down and meet your grandbaby?"

"I'll be on the next flight out. Same hospital?"

"Yep, see you soon Mom."

By the time they arrived Hotch, Emily, JJ, Reid and Gideon were there waiting for them. The girls ran over to Penelope and hugged her as Derek informed the nurses that they arrived. Shortly after Dr Manning appeared,

"Well Penelope, looks like the fun has started. Who's coming in with you?"

"Derek and the girls if that's okay?" Carly Manning nodded gesturing for them to follow as Penelope was wheeled in. Penelope looked back at Reid, Gideon and Hotch and waved as they waved back affectionately.

"You can do it Baby, you're almost there. You're doing great Baby, I'm so proud of you. I love you so much. That's it Baby you can do it." Derek encouraged as he sat behind his wife holding her while her best friends held a hand each. Four hours and 27 minutes later a loud wail erupted and their daughter was born.

"She's beautiful P, just like her Mommy." Derek said tears running down his cheeks as Penelope held their baby. Derek lowered his lips to hers, and dropped a kiss on her forehead.

"I love you P."

"I love you too Baby." Penelope replied tiredly smiling down at their daughter.

"Hey Baby, did you want to meet your Aunty JJ and Aunty Emily?" JJ and Emily who had stepped back to give the Morgan family a little privacy walked up excitedly to meet the beautiful bundle in their friend's arms.

"They're going to spoil you rotten, along with everyone else standing outside. You're incredibly blessed, you have so many people who love you so much, and your Daddy and I are so proud to have you as our daughter and we love you beyond words can ever express,"

"Penelope, we'll get you and her cleaned up." Dr Manning said reaching for Baby Morgan, reluctantly Penelope kissed her baby's forehead before handing her back to Dr Manning.

"It won't take long and you can have her back. We'll transfer you to your room and bring her to you."

"We'll go and tell the others and see you in your room. You did great hon. You made it look so easy." Emily said dropping a kiss on her friend's head. Penelope tiredly leaned back on Derek whose arms firmly held her.

"You tired Baby?"

"A little. We did it hon. We made a baby." She said looking up at him with her eyes twinkling with happiness. Derek grinned and kissed her on the lips.

"You did it Baby, I just held your hand."

"It was a team effort. Thank you for being you, and just loving me the way you do." Derek's arms tightened around her as he buried his face against her hair, whispering words of love in her ear. Dr Manning and the nurses all exchanged a look of envy at the undeniable love that surrounded them.

"Do you want to make the announcement Daddy?" Pen asked,

"Once Dr Manning is done, they can wait. You're my priority." Not long after Penelope closed her eyes from exhaustion.

"If you want to go and let the family know, she'll be out for a little while. If you're back in ten minutes she won't even know you've gone." Dr Manning said Derek hesitated for a moment,

"She'll be fine. I'll stick around till you come back if you want." Derek smiled appreciatively,

"Thanks Doc."

Derek slipped out of the room to find the waiting room full of their family members. The Danes clan had arrived, his Mother and sisters, and Jess had also made it in good time.

"Soooo is it a girl or a boy?" Derek looked at Em and JJ confused,

"We thought it should come from you." JJ explained.

"Thanks guys, he said planting a kiss on both their cheeks."

"It's a GIRL!" a chorus of 'Congratulations', endless hugs and pats was had.

"Is Aunt P okay?" Jess asked worriedly,

"She's fine Kid. She'll be happy to see you. All of you! I'm going to go back and be with her, and once they've moved her to her new room and she's awake I'll come and get you. Thank you all for being here." Derek said a little choked up. He gave his mother another hug before running back to where Penelope was. He arrived in time for her to be wheeled to her room. Baby Mo was to follow in her little carrier. Derek couldn't take his eyes off either of his girls. Derek picked up Baby Mo and rocked her as Pen slept peacefully beside him.

"Hey Baby, I'm your Daddy. I'm so glad to have finally met you Princess, your Mommy and I have been so excited to finally see you and hold you. You're so beautiful, and you know what? You're incredibly loved, not just by me and your Mommy but by everyone outside who's dying to meet you. Princess, I want you to know that I will always always always be here for you. Your Mommy and I love you more than anything, and though I may thoroughly annoy you as you get older, know that no one loves you more than your Mommy and I." Penelope smiled as she heard the tail end of their conversation,

"Slipping in disclaimers already?" she observed with a smile.

"Well I figure she's going to be a little mad when I tell her she's not allowed to date till she's fifty." He replied bring their daughter to her mother who lovingly took her in her arms.

"Don't worry Peanut, we'll work on Daddy. He's not as tough as he seems. Between you and I we can get him to do almost anything."

"Hey, don't teach her that!" Derek protested, knowing that it was truth.

"Are you ready for everyone yet? They're all waiting outside."

"Bring them in, and we can introduce them to our little girl."

Discreetly they all snuck into her room, breaking all rules possible. When they were all standing there gathered around her, she turned her daughter around to face the sea of adoring faces,

"Everyone meet Francesca Isabelle Naima Morgan. Fin, meet your family."

"Really?" Fran gasped, honoured to have her grand daughter named after her. Derek and Pen nodded.

"Isabelle was my Mother's name, I wanted my daughter to be named after incredible women."

"And Naima?" Emily asked

"Nadine for Luke's Mom, Aidan for you and Matea for JJ."

"Oh Pen." Both of them speechless, honoured. Luke smiled at her grateful that she had taken on his Mother's middle name and incorporated it with her daughter's name.

"Wait, you're Emily Aidan Prentiss?" Reid asked confused,

"It's my Father's favourite Aunt's Maiden name. It was either that or Gertrude so I think I was fortunate to get Aidan." Emily explained.

_**Hey guys, I think that's it. This is the end of the Aftermath. Thanks so much for hanging in there with me. Angst and all. I appreciate all the feedback. Be blessed! xx**_


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